It's so funny to me that I'm always surprised when God provides for me, whether materially, financially, or emotionally. But I always am. In the past forty-eight hours, God has, through particularly generous and gracious amazing loved ones, provided $400 towards the money-still-needed category. I cried today...it's so amazing. I just, truly do not possess the words to speak the praises of the specific people involved, let alone to express my gratitude to God for providing through them.
The really funny thing is how God has provided also for Daive. I don't even know if I've said anything about this already or not, but let me go on for just a minute. Early in July I had completely run out of dog food (this was when I still had four dogs) and went up to work to pick up my last paycheck. It was the first time since I'd been there that the checks were a day late, and I was in a semi-panic state because I was entirely out of dog food. Then Dr. Sonmor said, "Oh, you have a package over there." Earlier in June, before I knew when I was leaving, I had signed up for a food trial with Purina One, and they said the free food wouldn't come in for four to six weeks...anyway, it arrived then, along with a coupon for another free bag of food. Then this week, I had again run out of food entirely. When the lady took Juliette and White Puppy, I insisted that she take the big container of food, and I just took some out for Daive, thinking I'd be getting money in some way or form before I'd run out. Well my Dad generously put extra money on my Wal-Mart gift card that same day and I ended up having the money to buy food for her. And the people up at work have helped me IMMEASURABLY to figure out what all I'll need to take for Daive, not only so she'll be allowed in the country, but to keep her in decent health while she is over there. The verses I have been meditating on frequently over the past month and a half are the verses that refer to the birds of the air and the lilies of the field...it's like God is saying, "See how I provide even for Daive? How will I not do the same for you?" It's amazing. And not only from a supernatural perspective...because God is providing through people, so the love that actual living breathing people have shown and generosity, it really just makes me cry just thinking about it.
I think next time I sit down here, I'm going to list out everyone who has been beyond amazing in my life...beware, the next post will be extra-long. I'm going to go spend some more time with my wonderful friend Jonny...good night all. Love you!
Saturday, July 31, 2004
Thursday, July 29, 2004
A dream come true....
Tonight has been an important evening in my life. A major life goal has been accomplished, and I am feeling spectacular about it. I rode on a motorcycle. For those of you who know me well, you understand just how significant that is, and for those of you that don't...take my word on it.
It was....amazing. I could see everything, smell everything (which might have been less pleasant had we passed any roadkill, but we didn't, thankfully). It was just breath-taking. I actually think I might have proposed to the guy who belongs to the bike and was so graciously fulfilling a dream of mine. Luckily, he's a wonderfully nice and tactful guy, and for the most disregarded all the MANY ridiculous things I said. It was so much more amazing than I can even put into words though...I really MUST own or belong to someone who owns a motorcycle at some point in the future.
I really did make quite a fool of myself though, with all the things I said while riding. I mean...really, I did. I won't go into any detail here though, because it's embarrassing enough in my memory, why immortalize it by putting it down here? That would definitely be a bad idea. Nonetheless, I'm working on the picture thing. Many thanks to Jeff (from To Whom) for giving me some pointers. We'll see if I'm smart enough to do it, but I cannot focus on it right now. Honestly...I was shaky and weak in the knees when I got off the bike. - Sigh - Do you think this is how guys feel about cars and such? Could be...anyway, that's all the interesting news for today. What an amazing day it has been!
It was....amazing. I could see everything, smell everything (which might have been less pleasant had we passed any roadkill, but we didn't, thankfully). It was just breath-taking. I actually think I might have proposed to the guy who belongs to the bike and was so graciously fulfilling a dream of mine. Luckily, he's a wonderfully nice and tactful guy, and for the most disregarded all the MANY ridiculous things I said. It was so much more amazing than I can even put into words though...I really MUST own or belong to someone who owns a motorcycle at some point in the future.
I really did make quite a fool of myself though, with all the things I said while riding. I mean...really, I did. I won't go into any detail here though, because it's embarrassing enough in my memory, why immortalize it by putting it down here? That would definitely be a bad idea. Nonetheless, I'm working on the picture thing. Many thanks to Jeff (from To Whom) for giving me some pointers. We'll see if I'm smart enough to do it, but I cannot focus on it right now. Honestly...I was shaky and weak in the knees when I got off the bike. - Sigh - Do you think this is how guys feel about cars and such? Could be...anyway, that's all the interesting news for today. What an amazing day it has been!
Wednesday, July 28, 2004
Passport Picture from... (well, you get the idea)
I'm so very sad because I have some pictures that I desperately wish I could share, and even had them put on a CD for that express purpose, but do not have the technological abilities to do so. :( All you wonderful friends of mine who are infinitely smarter than me, please feel free to help.
Melissa and I went to Dothan today to turn in my passport application, and we found out that I'm actually going to have to go to New Orleans to ensure that I can get it in time. That's a good and a bad thing, I suppose. On the one hand, we HAVE to go to New Orleans, on the other hand, it will require money (which I have so little of these days) and time (which she has so little of these days). Not to mention the fact that I no longer have a car, and her car would feel too pressured at the prospect of a ten hour (total) trip. Any ideas? I'm trying to make "calling-dad-to-ask-him-to-rent-a-car-for-me" the LAST resort that it really is, but the reality is that we're college students, of one kind or another. Between the two of us, we know enough kind of compassionate people that I'm sure we could find someone who would let us borrow their car, but their car (more than likely) isn't in any better shape than hers is.
In other news, I have been extraordinarily productive today. I was up at (GASP) 7:20 this morning, so that Melissa and I could go to Dothan together. It's been a LONG time since I've been up that early. Anyway, we spent the morning in Dothan, I got my passport picture taken (which is so horrible it is really quite unspeakable - truly, the words do not exist to tell you how absolutely wretched the picture is). The lady that was taking it was...strangely not helpful, also. She just stood there holding the camera-thingy (it was a camera of course, but shaped very strangely) and made conversation with me until I made the hideous face that she managed to capture for all time in the form of my passport picture. I got my hopes up, as she was trimming them, that perhaps that would make my head look smaller (doesn't make sense, I know, but it did at the time) and she said, "No, it still looks just as bad" or something equally not-so-nice but perhaps more descriptive and I'm just too embarrassed to put her actual words here. Nonetheless, Melissa assured me that all passport photos are terrible, but I just kept on looking at it and asking, "Please tell me...do I really look like this all the time?" And I assure you, it wasn't from vanity that I asked such a question - rather out of compassion (for those around me, that is).
Anyway, I have also done about three loads of laundry, got our film developed at Wal-Mart, and cleaned up the living room some. I feel much better now. I said last night that I was starting to feel like Melissa's bipolar lazy "wife," because she works, two jobs every day usually, and comes home just to hear of my emotional experience of the day, and the apt. is in the exact same condition as she left. But not today! :)
I'm really so sad about the pictures being outside the realm of my capabilities - they're both so very cute! Anyway, hopefully someone can grant me some help. And I do hope you are all doing wonderful.
Melissa and I went to Dothan today to turn in my passport application, and we found out that I'm actually going to have to go to New Orleans to ensure that I can get it in time. That's a good and a bad thing, I suppose. On the one hand, we HAVE to go to New Orleans, on the other hand, it will require money (which I have so little of these days) and time (which she has so little of these days). Not to mention the fact that I no longer have a car, and her car would feel too pressured at the prospect of a ten hour (total) trip. Any ideas? I'm trying to make "calling-dad-to-ask-him-to-rent-a-car-for-me" the LAST resort that it really is, but the reality is that we're college students, of one kind or another. Between the two of us, we know enough kind of compassionate people that I'm sure we could find someone who would let us borrow their car, but their car (more than likely) isn't in any better shape than hers is.
In other news, I have been extraordinarily productive today. I was up at (GASP) 7:20 this morning, so that Melissa and I could go to Dothan together. It's been a LONG time since I've been up that early. Anyway, we spent the morning in Dothan, I got my passport picture taken (which is so horrible it is really quite unspeakable - truly, the words do not exist to tell you how absolutely wretched the picture is). The lady that was taking it was...strangely not helpful, also. She just stood there holding the camera-thingy (it was a camera of course, but shaped very strangely) and made conversation with me until I made the hideous face that she managed to capture for all time in the form of my passport picture. I got my hopes up, as she was trimming them, that perhaps that would make my head look smaller (doesn't make sense, I know, but it did at the time) and she said, "No, it still looks just as bad" or something equally not-so-nice but perhaps more descriptive and I'm just too embarrassed to put her actual words here. Nonetheless, Melissa assured me that all passport photos are terrible, but I just kept on looking at it and asking, "Please tell me...do I really look like this all the time?" And I assure you, it wasn't from vanity that I asked such a question - rather out of compassion (for those around me, that is).
Anyway, I have also done about three loads of laundry, got our film developed at Wal-Mart, and cleaned up the living room some. I feel much better now. I said last night that I was starting to feel like Melissa's bipolar lazy "wife," because she works, two jobs every day usually, and comes home just to hear of my emotional experience of the day, and the apt. is in the exact same condition as she left. But not today! :)
I'm really so sad about the pictures being outside the realm of my capabilities - they're both so very cute! Anyway, hopefully someone can grant me some help. And I do hope you are all doing wonderful.
Tuesday, July 27, 2004
Lots to say...but very little time.
- Car is officially gone, but I only have a tad bit of the money. I'm quite confident that God will provide as needed, but I'm just so frazzled right now. There seems to be pressures on every side, and it's SUCH a struggle just to hold on to the reality of God's faithfulness.
- Starting to go through the few belongings I have with me in Graceville - it worries me though because most of my stuff is in Pensacola and I'm only going to have a day there. Scary.
- Worrying...but trying desperately to depend on the grace and providence of God instead.
Pray for me please. Will write more later.
- Car is officially gone, but I only have a tad bit of the money. I'm quite confident that God will provide as needed, but I'm just so frazzled right now. There seems to be pressures on every side, and it's SUCH a struggle just to hold on to the reality of God's faithfulness.
- Starting to go through the few belongings I have with me in Graceville - it worries me though because most of my stuff is in Pensacola and I'm only going to have a day there. Scary.
- Worrying...but trying desperately to depend on the grace and providence of God instead.
Pray for me please. Will write more later.
Saturday, July 24, 2004
Emotions
Well I'm sorry it's been so long since I've shared my thoughts and experiences. I honestly don't even know what all I had to say, though I know there was a lot I did want to say. I'm in Monticello, FL right now visiting Brianna (one of my most wonderful friends, who just happens to be Bethany's cousin). Her mom, who I call Aunt Sherri (cause she's Bethany's aunt and might as well be mine) is amazingly wonderful. I kept her up until 2:00 AM this morning talking, and it was just spectacular conversation, not just shallow banter. She's wonderful. Bethany also came up for the weekend so it's been really just an answer to so many different prayers. I went to Pensacola on Thursday and it was really just a spectacular disaster, for more reasons than I could even list if I wanted to. Thankfully Melissa went with me, I'm not sure if I would have made it out with my sanity had she not been there. Anyway though, after a day like that, a weekend like this is JUST what the doctor ordered.
I find myself getting more and more emotional lately. Today, Brianna and Bethany and I were in Borders, and I was looking at the dog books, and I started to cry when I saw a book on Bichons. I got myself under control though, but then when I was telling Brianna and Bethany about it, I started to cry again! Then I was washing my hands in their bathroom, and they have the Dial Complete soap (which is SO thoroughly amazing, you should try it if you haven't) and I got all teary-eyed, because that's the soap I had in my trailer, and it just reminded me of actually having a home and all my dogs. Poor Beth and Brianna have had to keep on reassuring me that I'm not just losing my mind, that this is a major life change and transition and all, and it's going to be difficult, but I still feel like an overly emotional LOSER.
Since I know that my time in this area is rapidly coming to a close, I've been trying to take as many mental snapshots as possible, and since I'm a sentimental sap, I thought I'd share a few of them with all of you here. Here are some of my favorites:
1) Riding down I-10 with Melissa on Thursday afternoon with the windows down and Meredith Brooks song (whose title will not be named as it involves profanity). It was THE perfect summer moment, especially after such a horrid day.
2) Sitting around the table here talking with Bethany, Brianna, and Aunt Sherri about the large intestine and colons, how enemas work, and the gross things I've seen come out of dog's butts.
3) (This is an older one, but wonderful nonetheless.) Sitting on the floor in Alex's Graceville Manor apartment the day before he left for Texas, with him and we were watching a storm come in and head back out. (The purpose was to finish cleaning the apartment, and that was eventually accomplished.) It was wonderful though, just sitting and talking before my very wonderful friend had to leave.
4) Today when Bethany told me that she had told Edward Daive and I would be staying with them for a few days and that if his allergies acted up, he could take medicine. I tried to thank her, but I doubt she will ever understand how much that meant to me. (Much of the controversy regarding my family encouraging me NOT to come home before leaving the country centers on Daive's presence.) The fact that she loved me enough that she wanted me to come and stay with her that she would do that for me....it meant the whole world to me.
Geez, I'm a sap. I'm about to start crying...the kind where you're gasping for breath (Haley, Beth, and Brianna, you know what I'm talking about specifically)...so I'm going to go lay on Brianna's bed and be social. I love you all (those reading, not just the people in Brianna's room).
I find myself getting more and more emotional lately. Today, Brianna and Bethany and I were in Borders, and I was looking at the dog books, and I started to cry when I saw a book on Bichons. I got myself under control though, but then when I was telling Brianna and Bethany about it, I started to cry again! Then I was washing my hands in their bathroom, and they have the Dial Complete soap (which is SO thoroughly amazing, you should try it if you haven't) and I got all teary-eyed, because that's the soap I had in my trailer, and it just reminded me of actually having a home and all my dogs. Poor Beth and Brianna have had to keep on reassuring me that I'm not just losing my mind, that this is a major life change and transition and all, and it's going to be difficult, but I still feel like an overly emotional LOSER.
Since I know that my time in this area is rapidly coming to a close, I've been trying to take as many mental snapshots as possible, and since I'm a sentimental sap, I thought I'd share a few of them with all of you here. Here are some of my favorites:
1) Riding down I-10 with Melissa on Thursday afternoon with the windows down and Meredith Brooks song (whose title will not be named as it involves profanity). It was THE perfect summer moment, especially after such a horrid day.
2) Sitting around the table here talking with Bethany, Brianna, and Aunt Sherri about the large intestine and colons, how enemas work, and the gross things I've seen come out of dog's butts.
3) (This is an older one, but wonderful nonetheless.) Sitting on the floor in Alex's Graceville Manor apartment the day before he left for Texas, with him and we were watching a storm come in and head back out. (The purpose was to finish cleaning the apartment, and that was eventually accomplished.) It was wonderful though, just sitting and talking before my very wonderful friend had to leave.
4) Today when Bethany told me that she had told Edward Daive and I would be staying with them for a few days and that if his allergies acted up, he could take medicine. I tried to thank her, but I doubt she will ever understand how much that meant to me. (Much of the controversy regarding my family encouraging me NOT to come home before leaving the country centers on Daive's presence.) The fact that she loved me enough that she wanted me to come and stay with her that she would do that for me....it meant the whole world to me.
Geez, I'm a sap. I'm about to start crying...the kind where you're gasping for breath (Haley, Beth, and Brianna, you know what I'm talking about specifically)...so I'm going to go lay on Brianna's bed and be social. I love you all (those reading, not just the people in Brianna's room).
Wednesday, July 21, 2004
Night in the mental hospital, day of productivity
How exciting to sign on today and see that I had four comments (even though one was a repeat - I love Priscilla enough to read her words twice!) :)! Nonetheless, it made me feel like maybe I'm not just talking to myself here.
Can I just tell you how productive I have been today? It's really quite amazing, considering that the past two days I think I was trying to set a record in how little I did. Nonetheless, I went to Dothan and put an ad in the American Classifieds (that's the Thrifty Nickel for all those who aren't current on the name change) and Alex, I thought of you when I decided to place the ad. I was sitting around and thought, "I should put an ad in the Thrifty Nickel. Oh wait! It's Wednesday, which means it comes out tomorrow" (that's when I thought of you, mocking me for getting one every Thursday) "so I could go put one in today." The ad will be in the paper but not on the internet, since I didn't get there before 11:00 AM. (I confess, I was sleeping at 11:00 AM.) But it doesn't really matter. I've seen enough geeky Nissan enthusiasts in the area that I think the chances of my car selling fast are pretty good. Then I went to PetsMart and Banfield, got some food and kitty litter for Calvin (did I ever explain why his name is Calvin and that it wasn't my idea and it has nothing to do with John Calvin?). I also had my water and power disconnected at the old trailer. Very productive, I must say.
Here's one fun little tidbit I must add: last night I had a dream that I had been committed to some kind of mental hospital. Isn't that horrible?! But it was a mental hospital for kids, and I both was and was not a kid (that's possible in a dream, you know). In the dream, I still was going to Israel, and so I had to escape from the hospital in order to sell my car so I could still go. The hilarious thing is that Bethany was in the area somehow, and hid her car keys in the backpack of one of the kids at the place so I could get them. Then I took THE most circuitous route possible to get to her car. (In real life, Daive and I went for an invigorating run/walk last night around midnight, then I did some power yoga so my muscles were sore in real life, but when I was "walking" in my dream, I remember thinking they hurt then too. Weird.)
You know, I even amaze myself sometimes with how wordy I can be. Gracious, I almost feel bad for all of you reading ALL of this. Though certainly you don't have to read it if you don't want to, so too bad for you then. Seriously though, thanks for caring. :) And the kindness, it certainly does mean a lot to me.
Ah yes, one other thing. Ovadya, a wonderful nice man in Israel that works for some sort of real estate company, has called me twice this week. He's been helping me look for an apartment. He called today and told me of two options, but I don't think I want either of them. But now I feel horrible because he has spent time (looking for the apartments) and money (he has called me from Israel because I could not figure out how to make an international call - and no advice on that, because I get it now) helping me and I don't want to be the stereotypical inconsiderate American, you know? Ah well...I suppose that's all for today.
Hebrew word for the day: gerev (sock)
(I'm on the clothing lesson in my new book.)
Can I just tell you how productive I have been today? It's really quite amazing, considering that the past two days I think I was trying to set a record in how little I did. Nonetheless, I went to Dothan and put an ad in the American Classifieds (that's the Thrifty Nickel for all those who aren't current on the name change) and Alex, I thought of you when I decided to place the ad. I was sitting around and thought, "I should put an ad in the Thrifty Nickel. Oh wait! It's Wednesday, which means it comes out tomorrow" (that's when I thought of you, mocking me for getting one every Thursday) "so I could go put one in today." The ad will be in the paper but not on the internet, since I didn't get there before 11:00 AM. (I confess, I was sleeping at 11:00 AM.) But it doesn't really matter. I've seen enough geeky Nissan enthusiasts in the area that I think the chances of my car selling fast are pretty good. Then I went to PetsMart and Banfield, got some food and kitty litter for Calvin (did I ever explain why his name is Calvin and that it wasn't my idea and it has nothing to do with John Calvin?). I also had my water and power disconnected at the old trailer. Very productive, I must say.
Here's one fun little tidbit I must add: last night I had a dream that I had been committed to some kind of mental hospital. Isn't that horrible?! But it was a mental hospital for kids, and I both was and was not a kid (that's possible in a dream, you know). In the dream, I still was going to Israel, and so I had to escape from the hospital in order to sell my car so I could still go. The hilarious thing is that Bethany was in the area somehow, and hid her car keys in the backpack of one of the kids at the place so I could get them. Then I took THE most circuitous route possible to get to her car. (In real life, Daive and I went for an invigorating run/walk last night around midnight, then I did some power yoga so my muscles were sore in real life, but when I was "walking" in my dream, I remember thinking they hurt then too. Weird.)
You know, I even amaze myself sometimes with how wordy I can be. Gracious, I almost feel bad for all of you reading ALL of this. Though certainly you don't have to read it if you don't want to, so too bad for you then. Seriously though, thanks for caring. :) And the kindness, it certainly does mean a lot to me.
Ah yes, one other thing. Ovadya, a wonderful nice man in Israel that works for some sort of real estate company, has called me twice this week. He's been helping me look for an apartment. He called today and told me of two options, but I don't think I want either of them. But now I feel horrible because he has spent time (looking for the apartments) and money (he has called me from Israel because I could not figure out how to make an international call - and no advice on that, because I get it now) helping me and I don't want to be the stereotypical inconsiderate American, you know? Ah well...I suppose that's all for today.
Hebrew word for the day: gerev (sock)
(I'm on the clothing lesson in my new book.)
Tuesday, July 20, 2004
tent for my kelev (dog)
I know that I forgot to say something semi-important earlier today, so I came back to say what I forgot to say, but now cannot remember. That used to always happen at work when I walked through the door into the back, which is how it acquired its name "the portal of forgetfulness." Creative, huh?
Well since I can't remember what I had to say that was at least mildly important, I'll just ramble on for a bit. Sound good? Hope so.
So the issue of the church sign, the reason I decided to set it forth for what I had HOPED would be a discussion was because of two books I am currently reading. First is "The Sovereignty of God" by Pink and second is "The God Who Loves" by John MacArthur. They are actually quite interesting. Pink puts forth the idea that God does not love the reprobate (those who will not be saved) but MacArthur argues the opposite. It really is all around a very interesting subject, but I fear that it is a debate that is more fun than practical. Though in reality, what could be more important than pondering the love of God and its limits (if indeed there are any in the first place) it's such an intellectual argument. MacArthur distinguishes between the universal love of God for humanity and the love of God for the elect, which is an unavoidable distinction, if you hold to the idea that there is such a thing as the elect. Pink's idea that God doesn't love the reprobate, while it makes sense in the overall idea of keeping all that is vile far from the holy God, goes a bit too far, and really quite far from Scripture. Doesn't God say that He takes no pleasure in the death of the wicked? (Ezekiel somewhere, I believe) Yet in Romans 9, it seems that God is glorified by the exact same thing. Arguably, there is a difference between God's pleasure and His glory.....see what I mean? It's such a deep and intellectual issue that I very quickly get off the point, and not only that, but lost people are probably quite offended/annoyed at the whole issue. Nonetheless, it's nice to have an outlet like this to just let my mind wander. Reading the two books has been very similar to dueling pianos, though certainly much quieter.
Ah, thanks are in order (this is one of the things I needed to say). Jeff put a link to L'Chaim at his website (http://towhomitmayconcern.blogspot.com) and I just wanted to let him know (again) how much I appreciate that. You're so very kind Jeff!
Yesterday at Wal-Mart I bought Daive THE most adorable thing I've ever seen in my life. It's a pet tent, a tent made specifically for a dog. You know that itty-bitty display model tents they put out near the big actual tents that are approximately the perfect size for a palmetto bug? Well, this is like that only big enough for Daive. It came in the smallest package, and I was thinking, "There's no way this will be big enough for Daive." But it is, and it is SO cute. One day when I have money I'm going to get a digital camera so I can share such happy moments with all of you. When I got back from the store yesterday and put the tent together, I was so excited about it that I had to find someone to appreciate it with me. So I went next door and showed Renee, who understands me well enough to know she needed to at least act enthused (which she did quite well, by the way). Daive is completely terrified of it right now, but I'm working on changing that. We shall see. I did take a regular picture of her, perhaps I'll have that roll of film put onto a CD so I can share it with yall.
Before I continue rambling, I will go now. Off to bed, and then more...well, more nothing tomorrow.
Well since I can't remember what I had to say that was at least mildly important, I'll just ramble on for a bit. Sound good? Hope so.
So the issue of the church sign, the reason I decided to set it forth for what I had HOPED would be a discussion was because of two books I am currently reading. First is "The Sovereignty of God" by Pink and second is "The God Who Loves" by John MacArthur. They are actually quite interesting. Pink puts forth the idea that God does not love the reprobate (those who will not be saved) but MacArthur argues the opposite. It really is all around a very interesting subject, but I fear that it is a debate that is more fun than practical. Though in reality, what could be more important than pondering the love of God and its limits (if indeed there are any in the first place) it's such an intellectual argument. MacArthur distinguishes between the universal love of God for humanity and the love of God for the elect, which is an unavoidable distinction, if you hold to the idea that there is such a thing as the elect. Pink's idea that God doesn't love the reprobate, while it makes sense in the overall idea of keeping all that is vile far from the holy God, goes a bit too far, and really quite far from Scripture. Doesn't God say that He takes no pleasure in the death of the wicked? (Ezekiel somewhere, I believe) Yet in Romans 9, it seems that God is glorified by the exact same thing. Arguably, there is a difference between God's pleasure and His glory.....see what I mean? It's such a deep and intellectual issue that I very quickly get off the point, and not only that, but lost people are probably quite offended/annoyed at the whole issue. Nonetheless, it's nice to have an outlet like this to just let my mind wander. Reading the two books has been very similar to dueling pianos, though certainly much quieter.
Ah, thanks are in order (this is one of the things I needed to say). Jeff put a link to L'Chaim at his website (http://towhomitmayconcern.blogspot.com) and I just wanted to let him know (again) how much I appreciate that. You're so very kind Jeff!
Yesterday at Wal-Mart I bought Daive THE most adorable thing I've ever seen in my life. It's a pet tent, a tent made specifically for a dog. You know that itty-bitty display model tents they put out near the big actual tents that are approximately the perfect size for a palmetto bug? Well, this is like that only big enough for Daive. It came in the smallest package, and I was thinking, "There's no way this will be big enough for Daive." But it is, and it is SO cute. One day when I have money I'm going to get a digital camera so I can share such happy moments with all of you. When I got back from the store yesterday and put the tent together, I was so excited about it that I had to find someone to appreciate it with me. So I went next door and showed Renee, who understands me well enough to know she needed to at least act enthused (which she did quite well, by the way). Daive is completely terrified of it right now, but I'm working on changing that. We shall see. I did take a regular picture of her, perhaps I'll have that roll of film put onto a CD so I can share it with yall.
Before I continue rambling, I will go now. Off to bed, and then more...well, more nothing tomorrow.
Thanks for commenting! Mary, yours certainly did make me laugh out loud, twice, in fact. For all kinds of reasons I'll, at this time, refrain from expounding on the church sign. Mostly because I don't have time, but also because I'd like for all of my friends and loved ones to keep coming back here and reading my ramblings.
Much has happened since I last have posted. Since I've sort of overtaken my good friend Jonny's house, I'm going to try to be brief. Friday I decided I was going to drive down to Orlando in the early AM to take Juliette and White Puppy to a no-kill shelter that actually had room down there. Friday afternoon a lady from Pensacola called me. She had gotten my number from the Pensacola Humane Society and said she was interested in one or both of my dogs. So I changed my plans and decided to drive to Pensacola on Saturday instead. We talked for a bit about Juliette and White Puppy, their ages, their breeds, their dispositions, etc. Then Saturday morning, around 9:30 AM she calls me and said that she didn't want either of them because she didn't realize how old they were, and she was sure she would have another bad experience with an older dog. I was pretty steamed. Then my Dad and Phyllis came over to pick up the few rubbermaid bins that contain all of my earthly possessions. While we were in their rented van going back to my trailer to get the bins and leave, my phone rang. It was a wonderfully nice lady who runs a small-scale animal rescue in Chipley, FL. (Close to Graceville and Dothan, for you non-BCFers) She said she didn't really have room for both dogs, but she could definitely find a place for White Puppy, since she's a Bichon. I then told her that I had some crates, dog food, and other random supplies I could donate to her cause if she could take both of them. Long story short...she came up and met the dogs at my trailer that afternoon, and ended up takin them both. Juliette lives with her at her house (and will be staying there) and White Puppy lives with her sibling. She asked for my email address so she could keep in touch with me, send me updates, etc. AND told me I could have Juliette back when I come back in two years. Isn't the providence of God so thoroughly amazing? I sure think so. And so I didn't have to drive to Orlando, though I certainly wanted to see Bethany, I'm not sure my car would have made it both ways. Another providential circumstance in Bethany's life by the way, she has been in training for her new wonderful job for the past five or six weeks, and if she got sick it would turn into a MAJOR headache for her to make up what she missed. She took the test for her job this past Friday, had to make an 80, and made a 94! Isn't she so amazing?! I know she is. Anyway, she spent all weekend puking, which isn't fun at all, but at least it was after her training was over! God is so remarkable.
Also, last night the lady from Chipley called me to ask me a question about Julie, and told me that White Puppy has her very own cat at her new house. Isn't that hilarious, for those of you who know White Puppy personally?? Whenever she would go to work with me, she would spend as much time as possible stalking the cats there. I never could figure out if they intrigued her or if she was waiting for the right moment to have a feast. Anyway, the wonderful lady from Chipley told me that White Puppy and this cat spend ALL their time together, sleep together, etc. and if you try and take the cat away from her, she'll wrap her paws around the cat and pull it back to her. I think that's hilarious!
I'm in such a weird transition place right now, by the way. I'm not going to spend much time in Pensacola, because there's really no place for me to stay. And everyone there is so used to me being gone that being there would probably be weird. And being in Graceville, which is where I am now, is fun because I get to see everyone. But I know that my time here is over, or very nearly so. I really am, in all actuality, quite homeless. And it's both kind of depressing but MUCH more exhilarating. Time is winding down now, and I'm looking forward to it, but I sure do wish I could sell my car, preferably yesterday. I need the money desperately. Nonetheless, I am quite confident that all will unfold according to the providence of God, which has certainly worked out far more amazingly so far than I could have even dreamed. So please keep me in your prayers. I've got to run - but in parting, here is the Hebrew phrase of the day:
Eifo ha sherutim? (Where is the toilet?)
Much has happened since I last have posted. Since I've sort of overtaken my good friend Jonny's house, I'm going to try to be brief. Friday I decided I was going to drive down to Orlando in the early AM to take Juliette and White Puppy to a no-kill shelter that actually had room down there. Friday afternoon a lady from Pensacola called me. She had gotten my number from the Pensacola Humane Society and said she was interested in one or both of my dogs. So I changed my plans and decided to drive to Pensacola on Saturday instead. We talked for a bit about Juliette and White Puppy, their ages, their breeds, their dispositions, etc. Then Saturday morning, around 9:30 AM she calls me and said that she didn't want either of them because she didn't realize how old they were, and she was sure she would have another bad experience with an older dog. I was pretty steamed. Then my Dad and Phyllis came over to pick up the few rubbermaid bins that contain all of my earthly possessions. While we were in their rented van going back to my trailer to get the bins and leave, my phone rang. It was a wonderfully nice lady who runs a small-scale animal rescue in Chipley, FL. (Close to Graceville and Dothan, for you non-BCFers) She said she didn't really have room for both dogs, but she could definitely find a place for White Puppy, since she's a Bichon. I then told her that I had some crates, dog food, and other random supplies I could donate to her cause if she could take both of them. Long story short...she came up and met the dogs at my trailer that afternoon, and ended up takin them both. Juliette lives with her at her house (and will be staying there) and White Puppy lives with her sibling. She asked for my email address so she could keep in touch with me, send me updates, etc. AND told me I could have Juliette back when I come back in two years. Isn't the providence of God so thoroughly amazing? I sure think so. And so I didn't have to drive to Orlando, though I certainly wanted to see Bethany, I'm not sure my car would have made it both ways. Another providential circumstance in Bethany's life by the way, she has been in training for her new wonderful job for the past five or six weeks, and if she got sick it would turn into a MAJOR headache for her to make up what she missed. She took the test for her job this past Friday, had to make an 80, and made a 94! Isn't she so amazing?! I know she is. Anyway, she spent all weekend puking, which isn't fun at all, but at least it was after her training was over! God is so remarkable.
Also, last night the lady from Chipley called me to ask me a question about Julie, and told me that White Puppy has her very own cat at her new house. Isn't that hilarious, for those of you who know White Puppy personally?? Whenever she would go to work with me, she would spend as much time as possible stalking the cats there. I never could figure out if they intrigued her or if she was waiting for the right moment to have a feast. Anyway, the wonderful lady from Chipley told me that White Puppy and this cat spend ALL their time together, sleep together, etc. and if you try and take the cat away from her, she'll wrap her paws around the cat and pull it back to her. I think that's hilarious!
I'm in such a weird transition place right now, by the way. I'm not going to spend much time in Pensacola, because there's really no place for me to stay. And everyone there is so used to me being gone that being there would probably be weird. And being in Graceville, which is where I am now, is fun because I get to see everyone. But I know that my time here is over, or very nearly so. I really am, in all actuality, quite homeless. And it's both kind of depressing but MUCH more exhilarating. Time is winding down now, and I'm looking forward to it, but I sure do wish I could sell my car, preferably yesterday. I need the money desperately. Nonetheless, I am quite confident that all will unfold according to the providence of God, which has certainly worked out far more amazingly so far than I could have even dreamed. So please keep me in your prayers. I've got to run - but in parting, here is the Hebrew phrase of the day:
Eifo ha sherutim? (Where is the toilet?)
Friday, July 16, 2004
Sad sad sad sad sad
I know that lately this site seems to be more about me letting go of my dogs than relating to Tel Aviv. But leaving is an important and necessary part of going, and so if you don't like reading about my attachment to my dogs, go away. :)
With that said, I have some very sad news. Oskar was euthanized today. It's a truly supremely crappy thing, but I know it was the right thing to do. He was, very rapidly, losing control of his bladder and his bowels, and I only put up with it for as long as I did because he was my mom's dog and because I love him. It would be unfair to him to try and find him a new home where they wouldn't be attached to him, wouldn't be prepared for his problems, and end up possibly mistreating him. Everyone at work was wonderful about it though - even Bobby, who I think majored in sarcasm (not that I can't take it - if anything, he's an overly worthy opponent), was exceptionally nice. I asked to hold him while they gave him the injection, just because I think it is cowardly to subject your dealy loved pet to a stranger's arms in its last moments. I've worked at a vet, so I've seen countless animals euthanized, and I thank God (literally, I do) for the solution that allows it to be so quick and painless. I cried, a lot, obviously, and I'll say what I said earlier - it sucks. It sucks really bad, and that's incredibly crude language that I try to avoid. Thankfully Haley went with me, and Lottie. Jennifer (the PetsMart trainer) was wonderful, as was Kalyca. I'm so grateful for the amazing people God has put in my life.
I spent some time online yesterday looking up incidents of terrorism in Israel, and accidentally happened upon some pretty gruesome and disturbing pictures. It's all so scary. I was driving home last night and reality hit me and I asked myself (out loud), "Why in the world are you selling all your belongings and moving to Israel?!" From an outsider's perspective, it really does sound like one of the dumbest things I've ever heard of - not that I'm having second thoughts. Reality is just beginning to set in.
My Dad is coming over to help me move the last of my stuff. Most should be just moving from Dothan to Graceville, but some will be going to Pensacola. I'm so glad he's coming to help - I don't know what I'd have done otherwise. Then I'm taking Juliette and White Puppy to Pensacola for a lady to meet them. She is looking for a small dog to adopt. She has a five year old though, so I'm thinking that Julie might be the best thing for her.
Anyway, I'm going to go. Haley and I are supposed to be having a "girls night out," but I'm back here on the computer, and she's asleep on the couch with a movie playing. Perhaps the dogs are enjoying the movie. Anyway, why isn't anyone commenting about the church sign? That's a great question, and I personally think it's sad that no one is sharing their opinion on the matter. Speak up! Don't be shy!
Please pray for me. I'm pretty drained right now. My living room contains all of my earthly possessions - I know that's the second time I've said that, and I don't know why I'm saying it like it's a bad thing. I'm actually pretty proud of myself. Six crates of books, one over-stuffed suitcase full of clothes, and a rubbermaid bin or two of miscellaneous items isn't all that bad. Haley's so nice, she said, "You certainly are a minimalist." She always looks on the bright side. I love Haley...and Lottie Moon (her boxer). I'm going to miss them a lot. Okay...I'm leaving now before I keep on talking. Please comment...let me know you're out there - I need to support. Love you all!
With that said, I have some very sad news. Oskar was euthanized today. It's a truly supremely crappy thing, but I know it was the right thing to do. He was, very rapidly, losing control of his bladder and his bowels, and I only put up with it for as long as I did because he was my mom's dog and because I love him. It would be unfair to him to try and find him a new home where they wouldn't be attached to him, wouldn't be prepared for his problems, and end up possibly mistreating him. Everyone at work was wonderful about it though - even Bobby, who I think majored in sarcasm (not that I can't take it - if anything, he's an overly worthy opponent), was exceptionally nice. I asked to hold him while they gave him the injection, just because I think it is cowardly to subject your dealy loved pet to a stranger's arms in its last moments. I've worked at a vet, so I've seen countless animals euthanized, and I thank God (literally, I do) for the solution that allows it to be so quick and painless. I cried, a lot, obviously, and I'll say what I said earlier - it sucks. It sucks really bad, and that's incredibly crude language that I try to avoid. Thankfully Haley went with me, and Lottie. Jennifer (the PetsMart trainer) was wonderful, as was Kalyca. I'm so grateful for the amazing people God has put in my life.
I spent some time online yesterday looking up incidents of terrorism in Israel, and accidentally happened upon some pretty gruesome and disturbing pictures. It's all so scary. I was driving home last night and reality hit me and I asked myself (out loud), "Why in the world are you selling all your belongings and moving to Israel?!" From an outsider's perspective, it really does sound like one of the dumbest things I've ever heard of - not that I'm having second thoughts. Reality is just beginning to set in.
My Dad is coming over to help me move the last of my stuff. Most should be just moving from Dothan to Graceville, but some will be going to Pensacola. I'm so glad he's coming to help - I don't know what I'd have done otherwise. Then I'm taking Juliette and White Puppy to Pensacola for a lady to meet them. She is looking for a small dog to adopt. She has a five year old though, so I'm thinking that Julie might be the best thing for her.
Anyway, I'm going to go. Haley and I are supposed to be having a "girls night out," but I'm back here on the computer, and she's asleep on the couch with a movie playing. Perhaps the dogs are enjoying the movie. Anyway, why isn't anyone commenting about the church sign? That's a great question, and I personally think it's sad that no one is sharing their opinion on the matter. Speak up! Don't be shy!
Please pray for me. I'm pretty drained right now. My living room contains all of my earthly possessions - I know that's the second time I've said that, and I don't know why I'm saying it like it's a bad thing. I'm actually pretty proud of myself. Six crates of books, one over-stuffed suitcase full of clothes, and a rubbermaid bin or two of miscellaneous items isn't all that bad. Haley's so nice, she said, "You certainly are a minimalist." She always looks on the bright side. I love Haley...and Lottie Moon (her boxer). I'm going to miss them a lot. Okay...I'm leaving now before I keep on talking. Please comment...let me know you're out there - I need to support. Love you all!
Thursday, July 15, 2004
Sort of random
There's a church just up the road from my trailer, and I drive past it any time I am actually going into Dothan. I'm a firm believer that churches really just shouldn't have signs big enough for slogans, because it is rarely ever a good thing. It's a random thing to feel strongly about, but the reality is that slogans short enough to fit on a church-front sign are usually picked because of how clever they are - but generally speaking those who drive by and actually read the sign find them not clever in the slightest. Nonetheless, one side of this particular church's sign says:
"We're not all the same but God loves us all the same."
What do you think about that?
"We're not all the same but God loves us all the same."
What do you think about that?
Tuesday, July 13, 2004
Lots of misc. thoughts
For the sake of brevity (not to mention the sake of my sanity) I'm going to be as brief as possible here today.
- Yes, I know about the bombing that took place in Tel Aviv on Sunday. Yes, it is very sad. Yes, I am still going. No, I am not having second thoughts.
- I found a no-kill shelter in Orlando that I can take Juliette and Oskar to, but the problem is that I'm not entirely sure my car will make it down there and back. If it were to break down, it would significantly decrease the amount of money I could get for it, which would be bad, because the money from my car is going towards my plane ticket and living expenses until we get our first paycheck.
- I might have found the perfect home for White Puppy. It's an elderly lady who lost her Bichon last year and wants an older one to be a lap dog. She's home all the time. Her daughter and I have been emailing back and forth, and hopefully we can get something worked out. I think she lives in central Florida, so I'm hoping that if it works out I can take all three dogs with me in one trip.
- The whole "getting rid of the dogs" thing is incredibly difficult for me, though I know it's the right thing to do. Yesterday I cried so much my eyes are still puffy today. The only thing that's getting me through is knowing that God seems to be leading me in the direction of Tel Aviv, and therefore, this is His will, for both me and my dogs.
- I emailed the other interns yesterday to see how their loved ones were reacting to news of the bombing. I got quite a few responses very quickly which surprised me. Two of the girls who responded ended up discussing their Jewish faith with me, and we're going to have some planned discussions on the subject later this week. They're both making Aliyah, which means that they are going to become citizens of Israel, and are using the TASP program to fill in some of the requirements and to get settled there. Anyway, as I was talking to one of the girls, she asked me if I was Jewish, and I said no. She said that she was, and we started discussing her parents reaction to her decision to make Aliyah. She said they were hysterically in opposition to it, which surprised me. I asked for the reasoning behind it, and she said that the type of Judaism/the section, whatever you want to call it, doesn't seem to care a whole lot for Israel. (Mind you, I'm paraphrasing here, so bear with me.) I asked her to forgive my ignorance on the subject and said I'd probably be picking her brain a lot about it. Then she said, "Well that will be great, because I don't know anything about Christianity. We can learn from each other" It completely stunned me. I've always lived in the Bible Belt of the south, and the thought that someone might not know about Christianity - even though I've taken Missions and Evangelism classes and know that there are people that have never heard, the thought that a Jewish American girl living in New York City might not know about Jesus just completely shook me to the core. It just reaffirms my deeply rooted belief that these next two years are going to be amazing in a million different ways.
I need to run, I'm currently scouring the internet trying to find some poor sap who wants to buy a 1990 Nissan 240 SX. Wish me providence!
Ah yes, one more thing...I received my book in the mail yesterday "Your first 100 words in Hebrew" and I LOVE it! It is, by far, the most helpful book I've bought thus far. And for those of you who are worried (Alex) I've decided to put a cap on my Hebrew book buying. There's one more that should be on its way to me now, and after that, no more. But the first 100 words book has taught me more in 10 pages than any of the other 3 or 5 books have taught me in their entirety! How wonderful!
- Yes, I know about the bombing that took place in Tel Aviv on Sunday. Yes, it is very sad. Yes, I am still going. No, I am not having second thoughts.
- I found a no-kill shelter in Orlando that I can take Juliette and Oskar to, but the problem is that I'm not entirely sure my car will make it down there and back. If it were to break down, it would significantly decrease the amount of money I could get for it, which would be bad, because the money from my car is going towards my plane ticket and living expenses until we get our first paycheck.
- I might have found the perfect home for White Puppy. It's an elderly lady who lost her Bichon last year and wants an older one to be a lap dog. She's home all the time. Her daughter and I have been emailing back and forth, and hopefully we can get something worked out. I think she lives in central Florida, so I'm hoping that if it works out I can take all three dogs with me in one trip.
- The whole "getting rid of the dogs" thing is incredibly difficult for me, though I know it's the right thing to do. Yesterday I cried so much my eyes are still puffy today. The only thing that's getting me through is knowing that God seems to be leading me in the direction of Tel Aviv, and therefore, this is His will, for both me and my dogs.
- I emailed the other interns yesterday to see how their loved ones were reacting to news of the bombing. I got quite a few responses very quickly which surprised me. Two of the girls who responded ended up discussing their Jewish faith with me, and we're going to have some planned discussions on the subject later this week. They're both making Aliyah, which means that they are going to become citizens of Israel, and are using the TASP program to fill in some of the requirements and to get settled there. Anyway, as I was talking to one of the girls, she asked me if I was Jewish, and I said no. She said that she was, and we started discussing her parents reaction to her decision to make Aliyah. She said they were hysterically in opposition to it, which surprised me. I asked for the reasoning behind it, and she said that the type of Judaism/the section, whatever you want to call it, doesn't seem to care a whole lot for Israel. (Mind you, I'm paraphrasing here, so bear with me.) I asked her to forgive my ignorance on the subject and said I'd probably be picking her brain a lot about it. Then she said, "Well that will be great, because I don't know anything about Christianity. We can learn from each other" It completely stunned me. I've always lived in the Bible Belt of the south, and the thought that someone might not know about Christianity - even though I've taken Missions and Evangelism classes and know that there are people that have never heard, the thought that a Jewish American girl living in New York City might not know about Jesus just completely shook me to the core. It just reaffirms my deeply rooted belief that these next two years are going to be amazing in a million different ways.
I need to run, I'm currently scouring the internet trying to find some poor sap who wants to buy a 1990 Nissan 240 SX. Wish me providence!
Ah yes, one more thing...I received my book in the mail yesterday "Your first 100 words in Hebrew" and I LOVE it! It is, by far, the most helpful book I've bought thus far. And for those of you who are worried (Alex) I've decided to put a cap on my Hebrew book buying. There's one more that should be on its way to me now, and after that, no more. But the first 100 words book has taught me more in 10 pages than any of the other 3 or 5 books have taught me in their entirety! How wonderful!
Sunday, July 11, 2004
Freaking out less now (which is a good thing)
I must start out by saying that I have tremendous respect, admiration, and sympathy for those amazing people who work outside all day long. I spent the first portion of my day at the flea market here in Dothan trying to unload a bit of the stuff I've acquired over the course of my lifetime. I honestly expected it to be harder than it was - I was selling/giving away stuff that, at one time, had tremendous sentimental value to me. On a somewhat related note, I must say that it's hilarious to me how all my life fits together through God's providential plan. Most of last semester I was looking for a travel trailer to live in, which meant getting rid of a large portion of my belongings. It's so interesting how God used that to prepare me for now.
Anyway, I made about $60 at the flea market today, which may not sound remarkable, but considering that the most expensive item I sold today was a microwave at a big $10, and most everything else was $1 or less than that, it's pretty good. Also, one must factor in that I spent about $15 on food for Haley and I. I promise, being out in the sun makes me able to consume disturbingly large amounts of food. I was there for six hours, and in that time I drank three bottles of water, two large diet cokes, one snow cone, a hot dog and small chips, and more boiled peanuts than I can even explain. And after I got home and took a shower and a nap, I was hungry again! It's really quite embarrassing! Nonetheless, I did have a wonderful time today. The lady that had a table beside me was VERY nice, providing me with bags (since I didn't have the foresight to bring any) and change (likewise, no foresight), and giving me tips on international travel. I kept on telling people, "I'm leaving the country...everything must go. I'm more interested in getting rid of it than I am in making money." It amazed me how many people actually stopped to talk to me and ask where I was going, why I was going there, etc. I've never lived outside of the south, and the whole southern courtesy and charm is something I think I'm going to miss a whole lot.
I also think I might have found a no-kill shelter to take Juliette and Oskar to. It's down in Orlando, which is great because it means I get to go see Bethany again. And no, I didn't do that on purpose just to make another trip down there - all in the providential plan of God. I'm going to call them tomorrow and make arrangements, and hopefully take them down sometime this week. I'm sure it's not surprising, but it's just near fixing to kill me. I cry everytime I think about it. It just seems like there should be a better way, you know? Anyway...I don't want to go on down that road again. At the flea market today Haley (wonderful wonderful Haley that I love and will miss horribly) had the genius idea that I should put up a sign advertising my car. I did, and actually got a nibble (which is remarkable considering it was right up beside my booth, all open, and COMPLETELY trashed on the inside - those of you that know me know how messy I keep my car, and it was pretty bad). Anyway, the guy wandered around it a couple times, asked me questions, obviously trying to look uninterested, and finally asked for my number so he could get up with me about it later. Maybe he never calls...but maybe he does. Again, all in the providential plan of God.
I'm feeling more and more prepared every day, which is wonderful and reassuring also. I'll be much more relaxed once everything with the dogs is squared away. Oh yeah...I don't think I mentioned this, but I also emailed a Bichon rescue group about White Puppy. I saw a show about them on Animal Planet once, they're very wonderful people. I just submitted the form an hour or two ago and they already emailed me to let me know they received it, are reviewing it, and will be in contact with me shortly. What wonderful people!
Anyway, I suppose that's about it for now. Actually, I wanted to throw in "5 tips from a TASP elder." One of the other TASP interns has been in contact with an intern who will be starting her second year when we first start in August, and she gave these five tips to those of us up and coming:
1. Come with an open mind.
2. Come with money, because you CANNOT survive on 2000 shekels a month!
3. Love kids - you have to, cause you're going to meet some bratty ones!
4. Be ready for schoolwork - it's hard work, not nearly as easy as I thought it would be.
5. Definitely do some traveling while you're here.
And with that I'll leave you all...
Erev tov (good evening)
Anyway, I made about $60 at the flea market today, which may not sound remarkable, but considering that the most expensive item I sold today was a microwave at a big $10, and most everything else was $1 or less than that, it's pretty good. Also, one must factor in that I spent about $15 on food for Haley and I. I promise, being out in the sun makes me able to consume disturbingly large amounts of food. I was there for six hours, and in that time I drank three bottles of water, two large diet cokes, one snow cone, a hot dog and small chips, and more boiled peanuts than I can even explain. And after I got home and took a shower and a nap, I was hungry again! It's really quite embarrassing! Nonetheless, I did have a wonderful time today. The lady that had a table beside me was VERY nice, providing me with bags (since I didn't have the foresight to bring any) and change (likewise, no foresight), and giving me tips on international travel. I kept on telling people, "I'm leaving the country...everything must go. I'm more interested in getting rid of it than I am in making money." It amazed me how many people actually stopped to talk to me and ask where I was going, why I was going there, etc. I've never lived outside of the south, and the whole southern courtesy and charm is something I think I'm going to miss a whole lot.
I also think I might have found a no-kill shelter to take Juliette and Oskar to. It's down in Orlando, which is great because it means I get to go see Bethany again. And no, I didn't do that on purpose just to make another trip down there - all in the providential plan of God. I'm going to call them tomorrow and make arrangements, and hopefully take them down sometime this week. I'm sure it's not surprising, but it's just near fixing to kill me. I cry everytime I think about it. It just seems like there should be a better way, you know? Anyway...I don't want to go on down that road again. At the flea market today Haley (wonderful wonderful Haley that I love and will miss horribly) had the genius idea that I should put up a sign advertising my car. I did, and actually got a nibble (which is remarkable considering it was right up beside my booth, all open, and COMPLETELY trashed on the inside - those of you that know me know how messy I keep my car, and it was pretty bad). Anyway, the guy wandered around it a couple times, asked me questions, obviously trying to look uninterested, and finally asked for my number so he could get up with me about it later. Maybe he never calls...but maybe he does. Again, all in the providential plan of God.
I'm feeling more and more prepared every day, which is wonderful and reassuring also. I'll be much more relaxed once everything with the dogs is squared away. Oh yeah...I don't think I mentioned this, but I also emailed a Bichon rescue group about White Puppy. I saw a show about them on Animal Planet once, they're very wonderful people. I just submitted the form an hour or two ago and they already emailed me to let me know they received it, are reviewing it, and will be in contact with me shortly. What wonderful people!
Anyway, I suppose that's about it for now. Actually, I wanted to throw in "5 tips from a TASP elder." One of the other TASP interns has been in contact with an intern who will be starting her second year when we first start in August, and she gave these five tips to those of us up and coming:
1. Come with an open mind.
2. Come with money, because you CANNOT survive on 2000 shekels a month!
3. Love kids - you have to, cause you're going to meet some bratty ones!
4. Be ready for schoolwork - it's hard work, not nearly as easy as I thought it would be.
5. Definitely do some traveling while you're here.
And with that I'll leave you all...
Erev tov (good evening)
Friday, July 9, 2004
His eye is on the sparrow...
I'm sharing this against my better judgment. I know that generally all (or at least the vast majority) of my friends think I'm just a tad freakish for how much I love my dogs. Now mind you, it's not in any sort of un-biblical way, it's just that I have truly always been the geeky little kid whose dog was her best friend. And I'm so completely okay with that - the God I serve is so remarkable that He has used even the non-human canine vessel to teach me a lot about myself and about Him. Please don't misunderstand and think that I'm a misguided person who thinks that animals have souls and/or have moral capabilities. I don't think so at all, though I think it would be nice in an overall sense for animals to be in heaven - it seems like they would if for no other reason than they have done their job - nature in itself glorifies God and has never failed to do so. Gracious...I'm rather far from my original point. So, moving on, I know many people think I like my dogs too much, and to be honest it's something I struggle with. I was watching a movie tonight with Bethany and a couple other people and during the first part a dog was killed. It made my stomach turn and I had to get up (though it was also a convenient excuse for me to get ice cream since I was already up at that point). Later on when people were killed though, I was completely fine. Bethany asked me if I get that upset when a child is murdered (on CSI or Law and Order) and I said, "Well, it depends." And she said, "That's messed up." And it is. And yet again I have wandered miles away from my point:
I like dogs, a lot. Particularly my dogs - I'm quite fond of them. And since it looks like Oskar is going to have to be put to sleep soon, I'm upset. And I've yet to find a home for Juliette and White Puppy. To be perfectly honest I haven't tried TOO hard. I keep on hoping I can find some kind of foster agency or find a friend or family member of friend of a family member who will just baby-sit them for me while I'm gone. But that's generally unrealistic. I was reading online at a particular website that said it is usually more merciful for an adult dog to be euthanized rather than being taken to a shelter, because most times they'll end up spending the rest of their lives there, thoroughly miserable. Goodness, it just about broke my heart. I cried...a lot. I'm just holding onto various verses - not a bird falls from the sky without God's knowledge, He feeds the sparrows and clothes the flowers of the field, and while I know that the fate of my two adult dogs (who are really ever so wonderful) isn't all that important to anyone but me, I know it's not outside His knowledge and providence. I'm just praying (and I won't lie, crying a lot too).
When I was young, really young, and had to spend the night away from my house, I always had the hardest time picking out which stuffed animal I wanted to take with me. I was always afraid I was going to hurt the feelings of those I left behind. Before I'd leave I'd hug extra tight all the animals left behind. Now that I'm older I know that stuffed animals don't have feelings, and real animals don't have feelings in the way that people do. But they do form bonds and attachments, and deep down, since the two I'm trying to find homes for were reject dogs in the first place (got one from the pound and one from the streets) I'm just scared they'll think they aren't wanted. Ridiculous, perhaps, but that's what it feels like.
I do believe that God is sovereign though (for those that may now be convinced I've completely lost my mind) and know that His providential plan even extends to the fate of my two dogs. I just pray (and ask that you would join me in this prayer) that He would show me His will, what I should be doing to find them appropriate homes, and that He would grant me a discerning heart to see and steer through the accompanying emotions. A long post, all about my dogs...but those that are reading would expect nothing less, I'm sure. :) Love you all!
Layla tov (good night)
I like dogs, a lot. Particularly my dogs - I'm quite fond of them. And since it looks like Oskar is going to have to be put to sleep soon, I'm upset. And I've yet to find a home for Juliette and White Puppy. To be perfectly honest I haven't tried TOO hard. I keep on hoping I can find some kind of foster agency or find a friend or family member of friend of a family member who will just baby-sit them for me while I'm gone. But that's generally unrealistic. I was reading online at a particular website that said it is usually more merciful for an adult dog to be euthanized rather than being taken to a shelter, because most times they'll end up spending the rest of their lives there, thoroughly miserable. Goodness, it just about broke my heart. I cried...a lot. I'm just holding onto various verses - not a bird falls from the sky without God's knowledge, He feeds the sparrows and clothes the flowers of the field, and while I know that the fate of my two adult dogs (who are really ever so wonderful) isn't all that important to anyone but me, I know it's not outside His knowledge and providence. I'm just praying (and I won't lie, crying a lot too).
When I was young, really young, and had to spend the night away from my house, I always had the hardest time picking out which stuffed animal I wanted to take with me. I was always afraid I was going to hurt the feelings of those I left behind. Before I'd leave I'd hug extra tight all the animals left behind. Now that I'm older I know that stuffed animals don't have feelings, and real animals don't have feelings in the way that people do. But they do form bonds and attachments, and deep down, since the two I'm trying to find homes for were reject dogs in the first place (got one from the pound and one from the streets) I'm just scared they'll think they aren't wanted. Ridiculous, perhaps, but that's what it feels like.
I do believe that God is sovereign though (for those that may now be convinced I've completely lost my mind) and know that His providential plan even extends to the fate of my two dogs. I just pray (and ask that you would join me in this prayer) that He would show me His will, what I should be doing to find them appropriate homes, and that He would grant me a discerning heart to see and steer through the accompanying emotions. A long post, all about my dogs...but those that are reading would expect nothing less, I'm sure. :) Love you all!
Layla tov (good night)
Thursday, July 8, 2004
3.....2......1....... FREAK OUT!
Okay, it's official. I am freaking out. Completely, totally, not holding one thing back, in a panic if I let myself think about it, freaked out.
Whew...feels good to admit it though, I will say that much. I was talking to Alex on the phone tonight and I told him I was freaking out and he said, "It's about time. I've just been waiting for it. I thought you were taking it pretty good." So it makes me feel better that my true friends do understand that freaking out is perfectly okay in a time like this. A time like what, you may ask? A time when I am supposed to be flying out of the country in just about a month, don't have a plane ticket or a passport, still have too many dogs, and generally feel not so prepared. Kudos to my dear Melissa though - she sat down with me yesterday and we officially have a game plan now. I would elaborate, but it's all the details that, while incredibly important and vital to my future plans, are thoroughly boring to everyone else.
So with all that said, please pray for me. I keep on praying that God will lead me in His will and give me grace and patience to appreciate His timing. I'd like to say that I trust God's timing and I'm just afraid I'm missing His direction on something I should be doing right now, but I think I'd be giving myself too much credit. Ah well...all will work out in good time - and I'm not just saying that, I really do know that it's true!
In other news, Daive's carrier for the plane arrived today. (It actually arrived in Pensacola a week or two ago, it just arrived to me today when Jen and TJ brought it with them for me.) It's very spiffy, I must say. It meets all airline regulations for under-the-seat carriers, has a telescoping handle that LOCKS (very impressive, I know), Sherpa padding on the inside for comfort, straps so you can wear it like a backpack if so desired, and oodles of pockets. Anyway...that much is exciting - that's a piece of the puzzle that needed to fall into place and is doing so quite nicely. Nonetheless, that is all for now. Stay tuned for further developments!
PS - I also got a new book today "Hebrew in 10 Minutes a Day." I don't know that I take its title seriously, but it's exciting to me because it has flash cards, sticky labels, games, and all kinds of learning exercises in it, which is exactly what I need to learn, so it should be loads of fun!
Lehitraot (see you soon)!
Whew...feels good to admit it though, I will say that much. I was talking to Alex on the phone tonight and I told him I was freaking out and he said, "It's about time. I've just been waiting for it. I thought you were taking it pretty good." So it makes me feel better that my true friends do understand that freaking out is perfectly okay in a time like this. A time like what, you may ask? A time when I am supposed to be flying out of the country in just about a month, don't have a plane ticket or a passport, still have too many dogs, and generally feel not so prepared. Kudos to my dear Melissa though - she sat down with me yesterday and we officially have a game plan now. I would elaborate, but it's all the details that, while incredibly important and vital to my future plans, are thoroughly boring to everyone else.
So with all that said, please pray for me. I keep on praying that God will lead me in His will and give me grace and patience to appreciate His timing. I'd like to say that I trust God's timing and I'm just afraid I'm missing His direction on something I should be doing right now, but I think I'd be giving myself too much credit. Ah well...all will work out in good time - and I'm not just saying that, I really do know that it's true!
In other news, Daive's carrier for the plane arrived today. (It actually arrived in Pensacola a week or two ago, it just arrived to me today when Jen and TJ brought it with them for me.) It's very spiffy, I must say. It meets all airline regulations for under-the-seat carriers, has a telescoping handle that LOCKS (very impressive, I know), Sherpa padding on the inside for comfort, straps so you can wear it like a backpack if so desired, and oodles of pockets. Anyway...that much is exciting - that's a piece of the puzzle that needed to fall into place and is doing so quite nicely. Nonetheless, that is all for now. Stay tuned for further developments!
PS - I also got a new book today "Hebrew in 10 Minutes a Day." I don't know that I take its title seriously, but it's exciting to me because it has flash cards, sticky labels, games, and all kinds of learning exercises in it, which is exactly what I need to learn, so it should be loads of fun!
Lehitraot (see you soon)!
Monday, July 5, 2004
In the beginning...
Well, my first post. I'm honestly having a bit of trouble with it, because it just seems overwhelmingly self-centered of me to start a site based on me and my life alone. Ah well, I'm thinking it might be the easiest way to go about keeping people in touch with me while I'm in Israel. So...with that said, here's the necessary background.
I'm leaving on or around August 8 to go to Tel Aviv, Israel for a two year graduate program. I'll be teaching English as a second language in the Tel Aviv school system and earning my Master of Arts in TESOL (teaching English to speakers of other languages) at the same time. I'll be interning in the school, attending ulpan (intensive Hebrew classes) as well as classes/seminars to count toward my degree program.
It's quite amazing how God has worked everything out so far, in providing the money required for the deposit, getting together my application materials so quickly, etc. This is, without a doubt, a work He has and is bringing to pass in His time and in His way. Which, to be perfectly honest, makes it scary. One thing about God, He is unpredictable (thankfully). Anyway, instead of sending out a cheesy monthly newsletter, as I had decided to do previously, I decided that I would start my own little blog, that way I could share all the important-enough-to-share-but-not-important-enough-to-send-a-mass-email details about my life in Tel Aviv. The next month or so will probably consist of me sharing the slightly insignificant details of the preparation for moving across the world, so bear with me for a bit.
Anyway, I guess that's really all. And by the way, the name of this site, "L'Chaim" is a Hebrew phrase meaning, "to life." Not to good life or long life, just to life - because life itself, by the grace of God, is a very good and wonderful thing indeed. So, L'Chaim!
I'm leaving on or around August 8 to go to Tel Aviv, Israel for a two year graduate program. I'll be teaching English as a second language in the Tel Aviv school system and earning my Master of Arts in TESOL (teaching English to speakers of other languages) at the same time. I'll be interning in the school, attending ulpan (intensive Hebrew classes) as well as classes/seminars to count toward my degree program.
It's quite amazing how God has worked everything out so far, in providing the money required for the deposit, getting together my application materials so quickly, etc. This is, without a doubt, a work He has and is bringing to pass in His time and in His way. Which, to be perfectly honest, makes it scary. One thing about God, He is unpredictable (thankfully). Anyway, instead of sending out a cheesy monthly newsletter, as I had decided to do previously, I decided that I would start my own little blog, that way I could share all the important-enough-to-share-but-not-important-enough-to-send-a-mass-email details about my life in Tel Aviv. The next month or so will probably consist of me sharing the slightly insignificant details of the preparation for moving across the world, so bear with me for a bit.
Anyway, I guess that's really all. And by the way, the name of this site, "L'Chaim" is a Hebrew phrase meaning, "to life." Not to good life or long life, just to life - because life itself, by the grace of God, is a very good and wonderful thing indeed. So, L'Chaim!
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