A bit abstract and sentimental

Money didn't come in today...who's surprised? You know, I really don't want to turn into this cynical and generally negative person - the stinging kind. I've known (and know) lots of people like this, and I find that I'm never really all that thrilled to be in their presence. So when I make comments like I just did, about how I'm not surprised, and being sarcastic - I think it's just my way of coping with the overly laid-back way around here. Everything orderly and compulsive in my brain (and that's most of it) fought tooth and nail against even thinking about adjusting to this way of life. But it lost. It's not to say I'm used to it, because I'm not. But I'm learning to expect it and accept it.



So Monday would have been my Mom's birthday. That makes me sad. I still miss her a lot - not in some sort of ideal romanticized kind of way - even though we fought (much more when I was living at home) we had come to an understanding where we could talk, share, and be involved in each other's life. It wasn't the perfect relationship by far, but it was one I would have liked to have kept for longer than I was able to. When I was on the bus today I was wondering what she would say or think about me being here. For those of you who knew her, you knew she was prone to worrying (a bit of an understatement). I remember when a group from my dorm went on a missions trip to New Orleans. At one point a few of us got semi-lost downtown. When I was telling her about it, she totally freaked out. So I think if she were still around, the thought of me in Israel would turn her into one big panic attack. However, I also think she'd be really proud of me. To be perfectly honest, in the part of my brain that's more a spectator to my life rather than an active part (does everything have thoughts coming from that area? if not, that's okay) I'm proud of me too. Not because I'm doing anything really great and amazing...cause most of the time I'm barely making it here. But just because I came. And stayed. :) I think staying is the more extraordinary part to my brain, because it was there for all the not-so-great moments. One of the other interns said to me during the wedding reception last night, "I think having your own apartment will go far in making you feel at home in Tel Aviv." This is the same intern who often gives such unsolicited advice that, regardless of her intent, always comes across as patronizing or condescending usually because they come from completely out of the blue. It's not like her comment was in response to me saying, "I just don't feel at home here..." We were just eating. Nonetheless, she's right in a way. But today as I was mopping (the Israeli way) in my apartment, I realized that I already feel somewhat at home here. I never would have thought I could get used to never really knowing what's going on around me - understanding the mother tongue of your country is something I always took for granted. But I am used to it. I've been able to be much more introspective because of it too, because it's not like on the bus I can distract myself from internal pressing matters by listening to someone else's conversation.



This is sort of random. I'm feeling strange today. I'm sad from thinking about my Mom, and I'm happy thinking about settling down here. But there's also a part of me that is sad about the fact that I'm settling in here. That would be the sentimental and emotional part that longs for the comfort of a known language, a familiar place, old friends, and my "old" life. Moving on in something everyone does many times throughout their lives, I know. It's necessary. I just don't want to dishonor my previous home/station/place in life by moving on too quickly and/or flippantly. Does that make sense? I think it could be considered very similar to grief. It's something that comes, whether you want it to or not, and you really have no choice about whether to experience it. And even though it's painful, part of you wants the experience, because in some sense it's the last way to honor that person. (Certainly their memory is honored, but that's not what I'm talking about here.) I think I suffer from the tragic delusion that I'm going to hit my peak in life somewhere along the way without knowing it, and therefore part of my brain keeps on looking back, enjoying the good times, reminiscing, etc. just in case it's all downhill from here. What a wretched thought to even entertain though! And it's so not true. It's so funny how life has been a consistently getting better - not easier by any stretch of the imagination, certainly - but better in a different way. I wouldn't go back, back to any of my previous "home"s for anything.



This is all so abstract and sentimental. It probably doesn't make any sense. I just wanted to share my heart with all of you. I fear that I've been doing much more of sharing my days, plans, and mind rather than my heart. And that's unfortunate.



So tomorrow is when I'm moving in. I cleaned today over there, I'm going to pack everything up tonight, and Mary and Eylon are going to help me move tomorrow morning. I could go on about why I think they are two of the most amazing people I've ever met, but I would hate to sound repetitious and insincere. I'd rather say nothing than have anyone doubt the true sincerity of my heart towards these two people God has so obviously placed in my life and used tremendously in such a short time. Anyway...we're going to go eat, and then packing. Love you all!

A significant day

I apologize profusely for the horrible "to be continued" nature of the last post. And then I just didn't say anything after that. I'm evil! I'm so sorry!



Okay...quick recap of the past few days. My money did NOT come in at the bank (as I thought) however....Natalie, another intern in the program with me, her loan money came in. And since they were drawn on the same bank, they allowed me to take out more money based on the fact that her checks were good and mine probably would be too. The story is that Wednesday morning (only a handful of hours away) should be the day. I, again, doubt it...but we shall see.



Here's some fabulous news....I got the keys to my apartment today! How thoroughly amazing!!! :) I move in tomorrow. The landlady, she's just amazing. After we got everything sorted out with the contract and money and such, she tried to give me furniture. These crazy Israelis....



I went to a Jewish wedding tonight in Jerusalem. The word "amazing" so does not do justice to what I experienced today. The ceremony, in Hebrew, was entirely beyond me. But the reception afterwards...oh my goodness - it was the happiest, most joyful, exciting, exuberant celebration I've ever been to. And there were some crazy dancing Jews there too, let me tell you. It was amazing. And I'm talking, old people. The father of the groom, he was being thrown up in the air by the men (it was an orthodox wedding so the dancing was separated by genders), and there were some grandmas getting down on the other side of the partition. Very exciting.



I'm going to go read for a bit and go to bed. Today was non-stop...way more busy than I even want to think about. Nonetheless, I love you all - AND.... (drumroll please......) here is my address:



Teresa Tucker

Dizengoff 269

Apt. 10

Tel Aviv, Israel



Okay, and I don't know the postal code yet. I'll work on that. I'm sure there's someplace on the internet I could find it, but I'm not up for that much exertion at this point. I'm thoroughly exhausted. Love you!

I'm not starting this morning out on such a good note. Today is the day my loan money should have arrived at the bank here. I'm quite sure it won't be there, but I obviously need to check. Last night I had the inspiration that, instead of making a trip to the bank, I would just call the customer service and get help to access the internet banking site. Of course that didn't work out - I don't even know why, but the woman said she couldn't help me. Nice. So I'm going up to the bank. And my attitude is not so great, which is not such a great way to start out the day. I'll definitely write and let you know what happens...though if it there, I'll be much more surprised than if it is not. And the thing is, if I haven't already made this clear, I need need need NEED the money, now-ish. Anyway, I'm off to shower and head up to the bank.

A snapshot to put in my internal scrapbook

As I mentioned yesterday, Yom Kippur ends today at sundown. Since there are no businesses open and no one driving, it's a day where all you can really do is sit around. I was sitting on a chair, half watching the movie Mary and Eylon are watching, and half reading the Dark Tower book I'm on, and realized it was one of those times where I want to freeze frame life and file the picture away in my mind to remember as long as I have the presence of mind to do so. I think I mentioned something similar to this in July or August before I left the States...and I thought it'd be nice to review a few of the most recent and most pleasant mental scrapbook pages:



- Melissa Kuder and I, coming back from somewhere, listening to loud music in the car (can't remember if it was her car or mine) and having a great time

- Riding in the car with Haley (and probably Lottie and Daive) going to one of any variety of places in Dothan, or to Gainesville, or to Graceville, listening to Norah Jones and talking about anything and everything

- Eating cheese dip at La Bamba's with Dr. Fazio

- Sitting with Alex in his living room the day before he left, watching the rain

- Bethany and I, in her car, driving somewhere together...talking, or not (this scene happened THOUSANDS of times, at least, I'm sure) :)



I think it's amazing to think about how many truly wonderfully pleasant moments like this I have. It's so easy, especially for me, to get so preoccupied with the really crappy times and dramatize my life so that it becomes a worrisome thing, but life is, overall (and only by the grace of God) something I'm really glad to have.



There have been more than the one snapshot moment from today since I've been here in Israel. There were quite a few of them when I was in Jerusalem. I usually have one at least once a week, since the #10 bus I take from school back into town goes through Old Jaffa, and has THE most amazing view of Tel Aviv (I'm going to remember to take my camera one day and take pictures, I promise). And of course, last night is one picture I don't think I'll ever forget (streets empty of cars and full of people, kids, and dogs). Life can be so pleasant. That's nice.

More about my students AND Yom Kippur

Okay...picking up where I left off earlier today...



9-H - the advanced class - they're all girls, and worked with an intern from my program last year. They're very smart, kind, and wonderful. One of the girls is extremely bright - she reads books in English, and she serves as translator for me when it is needed. After our first class, when they were leaving, each one of them complimented me, most of them being a variation of, "Thank you Teresa, the lesson was beautiful!"



The kids are absolutely amazing. None of the students (not only my own, all I see when I'm in and around the school) have been rude or unkind at all. Most all of them know some English, and all of them know enough to say, "Welcome! What's your name?" though all of them don't understand the importance of listening for the answer to a question asked. They're so eager to learn English - some so they can use it when they travel, but generally just because it's the cool thing to do. English is "in." They're a bit rowdy at times, but NOTHING compared to what some of the other interns have to deal with. Our program directors explain that away as relating to the socio-economic status of the area, and I'm not sure how right they are, but there is a definite difference in the attitudes of the students. Anyway, like I was saying, they're all very eager to learn, and hungry for affirmation of any kind. My 8-H group, we had some spare time at the end of one of our classes, and they were just milling around the room. They picked up some children's books (in English) that were on a shelf in the back, and one of the girls brought one over to show me. It was Chicken Licken. She said, "Chicken Licken is beautiful..." Then she asked if she could read it to me, and I (of course) said that she could. And so she did. We didn't get to finish it before class was over, and the next time we had our group she asked if she could finish it. You have to really understand how these kids say the word beautiful. And I really can't think of any way to spell it or write it where you could understand...but the way they say it - it's endearing, funny, cute, everything. With my 9-H group, in class one day we read a short paragraph together and then they had to answer some questions. This is how the assignment checking went. They would tell me they finished, and I would say, "Okay, great!" They would then look at me, and hand me their paper, which I would look over and attempt to hand back to them accompanied by another affirming word. (To my credit, I learned after the second student.) They wouldn't take it back from me until I wrote on it - to prove they had done it and I had checked it. Their regular teacher signs her name on it, and I decided to write some nice word on each one - marvelous, terrific, fabulous, wonderful, etc. along with a smiley face. Now it's become an institution, and instead of the lessons being "beautiful," they're stupendous or fantastic - it's great.



They're all very complex kids though - it would be impossible to live in Israel and grow up in the arguably pleasant cocoon I enjoyed as an American, but for the kids in my school (who are Arab, and many are Muslim) it's more than just living in a war-torn country. There's such a divide between the Arab-Israelis and Jewish-Israelis. Tuesday, with my 9-R class, one part of our exercise was for them to tell me what their favorite color was and why they liked it. The only boy in the group told me that his favorite color was red, because it reminded him of the people who have died. He actually used the word "memorial," (after a thorough search through the Arabic-English dictionary, that is) and so it wasn't at all a morbid thought. It was a way of honoring the memory of...I'm not entirely sure who "the people" are, but still. There is a depth and a sensitivity in the students I've been able to spend time with that surprises me.



I know I've posted an awful lot in the past day or so...sorry to overwhelm anyone :) it's just that I actually have time on my hands while I'm in close proximity to a computer, so I figured I'd take advantage of it. On that note, I'm going to go on some more.



Yom Kippur began at sundown Friday night (it's technically Saturday as I'm typing this now). Yom Kippur (day of atonement) is the holiest day in Judaism, as I've mentioned. No businesses are supposed to be open, no one drives, it's an EXTREMELY quiet time. Now...I'd heard all this, heard about it, had the atmosphere of the holiday described to me, but it didn't do it justice at all. Since no one drives (except for emergency vehicles) the roads are empty...empty of cars, that is. The roads are, therefore, full of everything else - Mary, Eylon, and I just took the dogs for a walk down one of the major streets here, and there were people everywhere! Kids riding their bikes, people on rollerblades, people just walking, people with their dogs - all just strolling down the middle of the street. It was a bit bizarre...Mary said at one point that she felt like she was in Westside Story, and that the people on the street were going to break out in song at any moment...and that sums up the mood perfectly. It wasn't just that people were in the middle of the streets - it's also the amount of people out. They were out in droves. Eylon said that the people who fast on Yom Kippur (observant Jews) usually stay up really late into the night, so they can sleep in late - the sooner sundown comes, the sooner they can eat again. Anyway, it was really amazing, something I'm definitely happy I was able to experience.



So I suppose that's about it for now. I took a three hour nap earlier today, completely on accident (in my defense though, I'm still not feeling great), so I'm not even remotely sleepy now. I thought about staying up long enough to call someone in the States when it would actually be convenient for them, and not just me...but I doubt I'll last that long. Update on my progress through the Dark Tower series - I should finish the 4th book tonight or tomorrow, Mary doesn't have the 5th, but she does have the 6th, and the 7th (and last, which just came out this week) arrived Thursday. Very exciting! I highly recommend them, to anyone who has not read them. I'm not a big Stephen King fan (much to the chagrin of my sisters), the first book of his I attempted to read was "Insomnia," and it was freaky and hard to follow. But these books, science fiction or not, are amazing. And I'm completely NOT a sci-fi fan...but they're great. Very captivating. Anyway...I'm just rambling, so I'll go now. Love you all!

About my students

I was just reading, and I realized that I still had not even attempted to describe my classes and groups of students yet, and it's honestly just shameful. School has been extremely instrumental in the process of adjusting and settling into life here, and such a description of it is long overdue. And since my schedule seems relatively set now (not in stone or anything close to it, but set somewhat anyway) I can be more certain and specific.



I have two 8th grade groups and two 9th grade groups. Both 9th grade groups and one of the 8th grade groups has 8 students in each, and the other 8th grade group has 10. Here's how I'll refer to them in the future:



8-H - Regular teacher is Hanin (hence the "H"). This is the advanced class, and in my group are 7 girls and 1 boy. This is the group that told Hanin they wanted a translator after our first group time together. They can speak English....somewhat. There is a lot of struggling for words, and translation into Arabic of what I said for the other students. It is amazing how they work together and help each other though. In this group I've yet to become overly concerned that instead of translating for the other students, that they are actually just holding a conversation in Arabic (under the clever ruse of translation), but it is an issue and point of contention in some other groups.



8-M - Regular teacher is Mona, and I'm not sure about the number of boys and girls (I've only been with them once, and then only for about 15 minutes). These students were described to me as "weaker," and, for a quick insight into the Israeli public school system, the classes are set based on the strength of the student (deeper explanation possible, it's because of a test they have to take in the last two years of high school, but I promise it does make sense). These students are definitely more rambunctious than the other 8th grade group - at least they were for those 15 minutes. They know less English than the other 8th graders, and it's very challenging for me. Mona (their regular teacher) asked me to focus more on social interaction in my time with them, which actually lightens my load considerably. This means we talk a lot. She assigns them work when she has them, and when they're with me, we'll mostly just be discussing it, I'll be asking additional questions, and so on. Nice.



9-R - Rasmia is their regular teacher. This class terrified me when I sat in and observed it for the first time on Monday. This is the weaker 9th graders, and also students with behavioral/discipline problems. An interesting factoid I'm not sure if I've mentioned or not already, students attending public schools in Israel have to buy their own textbooks. In class on Monday with this group, very few students actually had the books. A few had made photocopies of someone else's books (for the few pages they were supposed to be doing) and many just didn't have either. To be perfectly honest, Rasmia terrified me at first. From the first time I saw her around to the school, until after the end of the class I observed on Monday, I was scared halfway to death. She is one tough lady, I'll tell you that much for sure. And when she was yelling/screaming at the kids during class (in Arabic) I had the thought, "I now kinda understand what Daive feels like when I'm yelling at her...scared, terrified really, and NO CLUE as to what is being said." However, Rasmia is one of the nicest people I've ever known. She's absolutely amazing!



9-H Hanin is their teacher. They're the advanced students.



The rest of this description will have to be continued...Mary and Eylon just got back and I'm tired of looking pathetic and useless at the computer. I'll write more soon, I promise.



9-H - Regular teacher is Hanin. This is the advanced class

A day in my life

I took two benadryl about an hour and a half ago, and I'm struggling to stay awake, but feel rather compelled to do so at the same time. I'm frustrated with the site because it isn't showing the last two posts (both from today) and I'm frustrated with myself because basically all of my posts lately have been really negative and have certainly not shown a balanced view of my life here in Tel Aviv.



Just for fun...I'm going to lead you through (in pain-staking detail, probably) a day in my life...Monday actually...so here goes:

• 4:30 AM - Alarm goes off too early so I can feel the satisfaction of turning it off and going back to sleep. It's psychological, I know, but I wake up feeling more refreshed, like I got to sleep for longer than I was supposed to, and feel more rested.
• 6:15 AM - Actually get out of bed, after turning off the alarm a few more times (thankfully my roommate is a sound sleeper)
• 6:40 AM - Am rushing around the room, trying to be quiet so as to not wake up my roommate, finding what I'm going to wear, getting together whatever books I need to take with me to school that day. I hear the #25 bus go by outside (the windows and door to the balcony stay open, and since we're on the 4th floor the trees don't block the noise of the bus - and yes I can really tell it was the 25 going by, because it has a very distinctive sound...I'll explain later)
• 6:47-ish - Take my time going downstairs and walking across the street to the bus stop, since the 25 just went by, I have a few minutes to spare
• 6:53-ish - Board the #25 bus and ride it for about 20 minutes
• 7:13-ish - Get off 25 bus and wait for #10 bus (the #10 bus goes by about three times an hour, so I have to leave at such an unrealistic hour to catch the earlier one)
• 7:30 - I arrive at school in Jaffa around this time every morning. Like I said, because of the #10 bus, I either arrive half an hour early, or 15 minutes late. I spend the half hour leisurly sipping a Diet Coke from the coke machine, and either talking with one of the teachers or reading whatever book I brought with me
• 8:00 - Usually have a two-period block with a group of students where we do whatever was planned for the day. This week I brought in articles describing Hurricane Ivan and taught my 8th grade students the meaning of the words "appliance" and "debris." (That was all we had time for, because they had to attend some sort of assembly or lecture that their regular teacher didn't know about, so we only had about 15 minutes together.)
• 8:30-12:30 - Lounge about in the teacher's room, reading (thankfully I'm devouring Stephen King's "The Dark Tower" series right now, or such long breaks would be torturous). At some point I stroll over to the little snack bar and get a large toast for 10 shekels (it's a long piece of bread toasted with cheese and olives between the two pieces - it's amazing)
• 12:30 - Observe a 9th grade class for the first time. I'll be getting a group of students from this class for the first time tomorrow. They are the weaker students, and quite a few of them have behavioral/discipline problems (says their regular teacher - not me, I would never be so presumptuous as to make a statement like that after watching them for less than an hour). I leave the class trembling somewhat with fear, moderately sure that I will be eaten and spit out by these students.
• 1:15 - Left school - was supposed to stay for my first class with the new 9th graders, but it's an after-school thing and none of them knew about it and therefore couldn't tell their parents. We (their regular teacher and I) make arrangements for the next day and I leave.
• 1:20-3:00 - Stood around for about 10 minutes drinking water and waiting for the #10 bus, then got bored and thought I'd walk around Jaffa a bit and look for apartments. Given my schedule on Mondays and Tuesdays (I have rather substantial gaps between my classes) I've thought long and hard about finding a flat in Jaffa so I could go home during those times, let Daive out, and eat there.
• Found one sign up, copied down the phone number and the word above it (which was in Hebrew) praying the whole time that it meant "rent" instead of "sell."
• 2:00 - Board the #88 bus and try to use my Dan bus pass for the #88 EGGED bus. Boy...did I feel stupid. Thankfully I had change.
• 2:08-ish - Board the 25 again (after leaving the infernal Egged 88) and settle in to go home.
• 2:15-ish - At a stop sign, I notice a sign taped to a phone booth with a picture of a scooter/moped on it. The same word I copied from the sign in Jaffa is on the paper with the moped, and I realize that it's unlikely that someone is offering to rent out his moped, and therefore that the apartment, even though it looked spacious, had a nice view, and was near lots of grass AND my school, was a fantasy.
• 3:00 - Called a lady from the madas list (list of apartments put out by Tel Aviv University) that I had called and set up an appointment the previous week to look at the apartment she was renting. We set another time - around 4:30 or 4:45 out in front of the apartment.
• 3:30 PM - I leave the dorms and ride the #25 and the #5 to Dizengoff (one of the major roads in the city) where I get off to look for #269. I am determined to be on time (probably early even!) and rested by the time the landlady arrives.

Okay, here I must interrupt myself. The numbering of the houses here completely confounds me. For all I know though, it could be like this in the States too and I just never realized it. I don't think so, though. Anyway...on one side of the street you'll have the even numbers, say for 250-270. On the other side of the street you'll have the odd numbers for 219-237. Makes no sense to me. Ayway, since I left so early, I was able to take my time in finding the actual location of the apartment. (The week before I had waited outside of Dizengoff #268, which was not only on the wrong side of the street, but also at least a good two or three blocks from the correct location. Go Teresa.

- Condensed version: fell in love with the apartment, worked out (or so I thought, anyway) details regarding payment and such, and then I head over to Mary's (walking in the clouds all the way back to the #5 bus stop).

I'm sure you'll all hate me for interrupting such a riveting commentary on the wonder that is my life...but I am about to pass out. I'm exhausted, and am losing the battle to keep my eyes open. I love you all...I'll finish tomorrow.

Update on my progress

Well it looks like the apartment will be delayed a few more days. The strike is over, as I already mentioned (I think) but I've been sick, as I know I've mentioned, and wasn't really up to accomplishing all that needed to be accomplished in order to get everything taken care of today. The apartment is mine, I'm 99.99% sure...she told me she's been telling people who call about it that it is already promised to someone. And waiting until Sunday/Monday will actually be the better thing to do because it means that there will (hopefully, assuming a few things work out as hoped) be a lot less hassle and trouble involved for me and my landlady.



Here's an interesting little factoid, I'm not sure if I've mentioned it yet or not. In the pharmacies here - in all fairness, I think I've only been in a few different types of the same chain pharmacy store, but still - all the medicine (Advil, itch medicine, even zit cream!) is behind the counter at the pharmacy. It's not like in the old familiar Wal-Mart, where you can go pick out whatever you want. So I was going to get some sinus medicine today, but wimped out due to the long line, and the inevitable hassle it would have been. I made a doctor's appointment, but the earliest one available was on Sunday evening...so I'm just going to attempt to hold out until then. I'm sure I'll be fine, just not as comfortable as I could be. It's amazing how many times a day I realize how spoiled and what a truly comfortable life I am used to living. Anyway, tomorrow the whole country shuts down around noon for Yom Kippur and is ceased until Saturday night, so when I go out tonight I have to remember to pick up a few vital necessities. Word has it, it's actually illegal to open a shop/restaurant/cafe in the country on Yom Kippur.



Two very exciting things did happen today though. First of all, in the pharmacy, I found Kleenex tissues with menthol. I could only find those in the area of Florida/Alabama where I lived once...it was such a wonderful moment! Also, when walking back to Mary's house, I happened to glance in the window of this little store, and they had a few boxes of Cheez-its for sale in the window! I paid about $11 for two boxes of Cheez-its that would have cost less than $5 in the states. (It was 50 shekels for both boxes.) But little things like that...even though they don't taste good to me at all right now/anymore, just the familiarity is comforting. Even if I get overwhelmingly sick of them (which is possible but not probable) the dogs LOVE them...so they won't go to waste, that's for sure. I suppose that's about all for now. I love you all!

Sick in a foreign country

It's 9:30 AM and I'm supposed to be at school right now. Obviously, I am not. I'm at Mary's house, typing on her computer, not feeling well. I've spent I'd say the last 12 hours or so feeling not so well in a significant way. I'm going to have to go to the doctor, and to be perfectly honest, it's not an experience I'm looking forward to at all. Even though the doctor I go to will be able to speak some sort of English, it's just not an experience I think will be enjoyable or fun in the least.



In other news, however, obtaining my apartment hit a speedbump in the form of a strike. The landlady couldn't get the water turned on because of the strike, I couldn't go to the bank because of the strike, etc. so I spent the night at Mary's last night. (She and Eylon were kind, generous, selfless, and generally amazing enough to come help me haul all SIX bags full of my stuff from the dorm to their apartment last night.) The strike is over, thankfully, and the landlady said she'd get the water turned on today. If all goes well, I should get the keys this afternoon sometime. However, I've grown accustomed to the laid-back, Israeli way, and will actually be rather surprised if I end up with keys to the apartment by the end of the day today. We shall see.



I have to go dig out my list of doctor's from one of the many suitcases I brought over last night. (It's amazing how my belongings went from two suitcases and a backpack to three suitcases, two backpacks, one large vacuum-seal bag (wouldn't fit in any of the suitcases), and a box. I didn't really pack yesterday, I just sort of tossed.) Anyway, that's all for now. I'll be sure to update you later on today on the status of the quest for the keys to my apartment.



As a quick end-note though, I must say that I'm kind of relieved to be sick. Being physically sick for me, it usually makes me sad, because it makes me miss my Mom (she usually took pretty good care of me when I was sick, even though she was usually sick too). When I'm away from "home," being sick is always even worse because of that...and when I was laying in the bathroom of my dorm room yesterday, I kept on thinking, "I hate being anonymously sick." And it made sense in my head, I meant that to be sick in a foreign country, by yourself, it's just sorta sad. Thanks to wonderful Mary and Eylon, I was not sick by myself in a foreign country for long. Anyway though, the feeling of relief comes from just getting the experience over with - I've been sick, I've been sad about being sick in a place REALLY far away from "home," and now I just need to go to the doctor and move on with life. Make sense? Hope so.

Change of Pace

This post will be a change of pace because....I'm not writing from the pits of self-pity and despair for once.



First of all....I HAVE AN APARTMENT! I found it last week on the Madas (apartment list), and set up an appointment to look at it, but went to the incorrect address. Today I set up another appointment and actually went to the right place. It's an itty-bitty apartment...really more of one room. Not a big room either, mind you....but it's exactly what I wanted. The bathroom is huge, which is nice. It comes with a bed, with is really nice (especially since it's not a single like I've been sleeping on in the dorms). Plus to get to it, you don't go up the common stairs. You walk past the entrance to the common stairs and go down a few stairs, and there's my apartment. It's slightly unfortunate that it's on the ground floor, because it'll be more prone to bugs - BUT...the fact that it's more disconnected from all the other apartments means there's less of a chance that Daive will inspire wrath in any of our future neighbors.



Also they gave me a new schedule at school today...which is a good thing, but I have two new groups of students which will require more getting used to. I think I'm slowly beginning to understand what my precise, exact job is with the students, which is a relief.



Just knowing that I have an apartment is quite a relief. I'm moving in on Wednesday. So for all of you who are interested, email me and I'll give you the address. Love you all!

Welcome to Reality

Today has been not such a good day. I was again reminded of a few reasons why I've yet to fall completely in love with this country, this time in the person of a not-so-nice guy at the dorms who told me that I have to be out by Thursday. This leaves me in quite a quandry, to be sure. Plus I've been curiously sick for the past day and a half, just enough to intrude on my days (not that I'd be doing anything more interesting than laying in bed reading if I felt fine, but still). I'm feeling rather not incredibly happy right now, so please excuse me for moping. I'm actually going to not go on about this, because it would be pointless and incredibly unhappy. Love you all, praying for all of you in Florida and Alabama.

Homesickness

I wrote a rather lengthy post yesterday explaining how I've been feeling lately - which has been mostly homesick with a few other random emotions mixed in. I told how I ate at this amazing bagel restaurant two nights in a row because they had a type of cream cheese that reminded me of Bethany. I told about the exceptionally fun times I've had recently, which have all been with my amazing friend Mary. It was really long. And I pressed "publish," and then it disappeared into the oblivion of all that is the internet. Very frustrating...very very.



So here I go again...this time leaving out some details and sticking with the bare facts:



- Last weekend I got to spend most of the time with Mary. As always, we had amazing conversation and laughed a lot. She's a wonderful friend, and I am inexpressibly grateful to God for her friendship. She is one of the best question-askers I've ever known, and that may sound like a strange praise-worthy habit, but it demonstrates a curiosity about life in general and the ability to think critically about a whole variety of subjects. She's wonderful, and I'm glad she's my friend.



-Tuesday night I went with Mary and Eylon (Mary's boyfriend) to the restaurant where he works to see an Israeli singer. The style of his music was more Arabic, and it was amazing. I had a great time, though arguably it could have been better if we weren't in the line of sight of the performer. At one point during the evening he referred to our table as a "table of mourning." It was humorous, even more so since Eylon had to translate it for us afterwards, so we were delayed and uninterested. Great job for us.



- Wednesday night I went with Mary and Eylon to Eylon's parent's house for Rosh Hashanah dinner. Let me tell you about the food....first of all, the quantity of food was rather overwhelming. The food was amazing, but there was SO much of it. I was nearly full after the soup and salad...and there was much more to come. Eylon's family was incredibly kind, warm, and generous to open their home and allow two complete strangers to come along with he and Mary (Matt, another TASP intern, also went).



So the hurricane yesterday...it was freaky because nearly everyone in the world that is dear to my heart was in it's direct path. I spent the greater portion of yesterday being completely freaked out and trying to get in touch with everyone in my family. So far, everyone seems to be okay - thankfully. I plan on incorporating the news of the hurricane into my lessons this week with my students. I just looked through a photo essay of the hurricane at foxnews.com, and it was horrifying! The bridge on I-10 was seriously damaged - it just brought it a whole lot closer to home. I'm so grateful to God that everyone is okay, so far. I love you all, I'll write more later about last week (it was my first week of teaching).

I apologize for my absence

I apologize for my lack of...well, of sharing anything over the past few days. The issue is that I've been sort of discouraged about a few really major areas of my life, and I don't want to use this as a forum for negativity. So please forgive my silence.



The program I'm in over here, it's not exactly everything it was supposed to be, and I'm struggling to not become angry and bitter about the whole thing. I understand that I'm here for reasons, and there are many things about my life here that I love, but I have a problem, a legitimate problem, with some rather weighty issues, and am thus far uncertain as to how I should handle it. That's all for now. Happy new year everyone - eat apples and honey and think of me (it's the tradition, in the hopes of the upcoming year being a sweet one). Love you all!

A pretty blah day

It has not been a very eventful few days, that much is for sure. Did I mention before that it was supposed to rain this weekend? I think it might have sprinkled a few drops along one or two roads in town, but definitely nothing substantial. There's really not much going on. I have school tomorrow and Tuesday, then Wednesday begins Rosh Hashana (Jewish New Year, if I didn't already mention that). We'll have Wednesday off from school, which would be exciting if I were inundated with stuff to do. Since I'm actually suffering from a lack, however temporary, of things to do, I'm not too thrilled about the prospect of yet another day to sit around and do nearly nothing.



I've been learning more about the English curriculum in Israel, and it's far more interesting than I expected it to be. I'm just honestly feeling sort of "blah" right now. I need to go back to the dorms and read through some material Marion gave me, but that will require far more energy than I currently possess. Things really are going well overall, please continue to pray for me because the past few days have been melancholy enough for me for awhile. I'm ready to get out of that. Love you all.

Everyday life...

Usually everyday I think of a whole variety of random but interesting things I'd like to mention when I post. And everyday I forget nearly everything I wanted to say. So the purpose of this post, since today was rather uneventful, will be to try and include some of the most interesting everyday-life issues I think are worth sharing.



- It hasn't rained since I've been here. Most everyone I know won't be surprised by that, but having been born and raised in Florida, the thought that there are places where it REALLY doesn't rain all the time, it is actually rather astounding. The rainy season is on its way though, and I'm looking forward to it if for no other reason than it will hopefully wash away some of the stink in this city.



- The vast majority of people here smoke. All the time, everywhere. In malls, restaurants, elevators, schools....not buses, thankfully - but pretty much everywhere else. It's incredibly irritating, but I am getting more and more used to it.



- There are dogs very nearly all over the place, and most of them are never on a leash. I've been trying to think and figure out if the dogs here are smarter than the dogs in America or what - but they just walk beside their owner, stop at crosswalks, stop at the in-the-middle-of-the-busy-street waiting area for pedestrians, and are completely okay with it. Daive, obviously not so much. I'm not sure if I ever mentioned this before, but I found out in the Pensacola airport that she is TERRIFIED of luggage. Realistically though, the wheels on most of the bags are about the size of her head, so the fear isn't entirely unrealistic. Anyway, the feet and wheels disturbed her greatly. I can't imagine taking her through town, off leash or on, and her not being completely freaked out at the enormous and overwhelmingly loud buses, the scooters and mopeds that sound way too much like weedwackers, and the constant honking that goes on between them all.



- No litter laws. I was waiting on a bench one day for a bus, and I saw a lady come out of her shop, and drop some trash on the sidewalk. No big deal here. Also, just as a side note, there was a strike last week, and part of the area of the people on strike were the garbage collectors. Let me tell you about disgusting...the city smells like trash, pollution, and urine on a regular basis already...add even more trash, baking in the heat, for days..... - shudder - I'm glad the strike is over.



- Nuts are very "in" over here. Every little convenience-type store sells a wide variety of them: sunflower seeds, cashews, almonds, peanuts, and a whole lot more that are so far unidentifiable to me. They're also warmed. This is a normal thing, so I hear...however, the closest I've come in my life to eating warmed nuts are boiled peanuts, and I don't think they really count. Anyway, sunflower seeds especially are very popular here. So much so that I actually learned the Israeli way to eat sunflower seeds, which is far more effective than any other method I ever used. It's actually not the "Israeli way" it's just a much more efficient way, and it's sort of dumb to explain it, so I'm not. Suffice it to say it makes the sunflower-seed-eating-event much more rewarding because you can eat more in a shorter time.



- The elevators in the dorms I'm currently staying at, they're tiny. The capacity is four passengers, but I'm not sure what kind of people could COMFORTABLY fit four in these elevators. If I had to guess (keeping in mind what a lousy estimater I am) I'd say it was three foot by three foot - and now just because I've got it in my head, I'll measure sometime. But when you get in on the ground floor (by yourself, if you're lucky) and are going up, if you take a step to the other side of the elevator, the whole thing makes a load of sounds that are overall quite disturbing and can on occasion make you fear for your life. I'm much more used to it now, and it makes me laugh some - but there are still times when I get scared.



I can't think of anything else, and I suppose that's enough for right now. I'm intent on finding some schwarma before going back to the dorm for a thrilling evening of doing nothing (except for feeding my book addiction). Love you all!

Need help with object lesson...if possible

There are a few humorous parts about yesterday that I think I left out of my post yesterday. When the kids had me surrounded out in the courtyard, they were asking me questions about America, which seems to have been romanticized in their mind to nearly the same level as Never-Never land. Regardless, they asked me about what famous people I've seen. Sadly, they aren't familiar with New Kids on the Block...and I think that's pretty much the only famous people I've seen in concert. However, they obviously thought I was holding out on them, so they kept on asking me, and the three super stars they were most concerned about made me laugh and also made me a little sad. They asked repeatedly if I had ever seen Will Smith, Eminem, or Michael Jackson in person. If the sum total of American culture is found in the works of the three previous artists, I think we're all in trouble. Seriously though, Michael Jackson is huge over here. It's actually pretty funny.



I have one project idea that I think would be amazing for them, that most of you who read (you wonderful mostly anonymous people, you) could help me with. Postcards - I would like to somehow bring in a harvest of postcards from as many different places as possible. I know that I know people in Florida, Alabama, and Texas. Ah yes...also Pennsylvania. (Anywhere else? Don't be offended if I forgot.) So...all that are able, if you could maybe pick up a postcard here or there for me - not a huge undertaking here, for certain. And I'll let you know of an address to send them to shortly. Again...only if it is convenient for you. Thanks though. :)



I am going to go get another list of available apartments now. Then I need to go visit my dog. Tomorrow is going to be a rather insanely full and busy day, but I'll be sure to write on Friday if I can't get to a computer tomorrow. Love you all!

Yesterday was my first full day in the school in Jaffo where I'll be interning at least until June. It was, in a word, overwhelming. There were HUGE administrative oversights and communication problems, and so I spent more time waiting around for this meeting with the Danks and the principal than I spent observing in a classroom. I got to meet with my small group from the 8th grade for about twenty minutes, but they don't know as much English as I thought they did (based on what I had seen in class). I don't know any Arabic, and pathetically little Hebrew, so communication was somewhat difficult (if you didn't catch it, that was a massive understatement). The students were all wonderfully kind and warm, and excited about our group, but they told the regular teacher that they wanted a translator for next week. That was pretty discouraging.



Today though, today changed all my ideas about how the year would pan out. During the havsaka (break) I was sitting outside on a bench, calmly and quietly reading a James Patterson book, when all of a sudden I was swarmed. Talk about overwhelming...throw about ten 13-year old students around you, speaking two languages that you DON'T know and part of a language you do know, all speaking at once, trying to ascertain intensely personal knowledge about your life - it was a lot to take in, to say the least. They asked if I had a friend, and I said yes, quite a few of them. I found out though, that they meant boyfriend, and so they thought I was incredibly unfaithful. We "talked" about...you know, I'm not even sure. We talked about chewing gum, being fat or thin, and they kept on asking me if I thought they were crazy. One thing I've learned, at least about this particular class, is that any unexpected event or deviant behavior can, and usually is explained by, "oh that's just crazy" or "oh, he's just crazy." They asked me to read to them from the book I was reading, and applauded me. One girl told me to kiss my mother and father for her. And I think about nine or ten students told me that they loved me. It was touching, and incredibly overwhelming at the same time. I think it's going to be an exciting year, and though I know it's important to be their teacher more than to be their friend, I'm glad I could start out this way. We'll see.



The teacher I'm working with, Hanin, is absolutely amazing. She insisted on driving me out to this curriculum store in Ranana (I don't even know where that is, so it's a good thing) so I wouldn't have to deal with getting out there by myself and so she could help me pick out some appropriate material for the groups I'll have. We laughed a lot together today - she's very amazing.



So the program has ended up being absolutely nothing I thought it would be. In fact, in many ways, Israel is absolutely nothing I thought it would be. But don't misunderstand me - different is not bad. There's a lot I can't stand about Israel, and there are a lot of really valid issues I have with how this program is run, but I'm here, and I see why people stay - it's really for and because of the students.



This is entirely too long though, and I am entirely too hungry to keep on going - though, make no mistake of it, I certainly could keep going! :) I love you all!

Okay...and the other stuff

Okay, I just thought that after all the drama, the news that I FINALLY have a bank account was deserving of it's own special place on the site. So yes...I spent my morning in an amazingly productive ways...got up and took a bus to the University, which isn't a long distance at all, but I figure if I can put off the whole sweating buckets and feeling disgusting for more than an hour after I just took a shower (which is also an ordeal considering the lack of drain-ability in the shower stall) I'd love that. And since I put all the shekels into buying a bus pass for the month, you'd better believe I'm going to take advantage of it! Anyway...I spent about an hour at the bank, but have a shekel and dollar account now. Then we had our first TASP weekly seminar, where we just talked about our impressions of the first days of school and such, and then I went and got a Madas (listing of available apartments). And it isn't even noon yet! Holy cow...somebody had better stop me! I seriously just got about two weeks worth of errands done in less than two hours! I'm amazing!



Okay...I need to go eat some lunch before I pass out - I have been so hyper-focused on being productive that I have neglected food (imagine!). Love you all! :)

Finally....

I have a bank account. About freaking time.

No success at the bank

This could be a long one, just so you're prepared. A lot has happened - at least that's how it seems right now. It could be one of those times where once I actually start typing it ends up being barely two sentences. Though we all know I'm way too wordy to summarize even the most inconsequential event in two sentences. Anyway though...yesterday was the meeting at my school where I'll be interning. I was pretty nervous on Wednesday, as I'm sure was reflected in my posts then. Wednesday night though, I got to talk to my sister Valerie on the phone, and my other sister Jen sent me an email, and what they had was definitely providential. God used it to encourage me and get me ready for the next day. Both of them signed up for internet alerts so that anytime either Israel or Tel Aviv is in the news, they'll get an alert sent to them. Also Val told me that she found a radio station over here that broadcasts over the internet and plays mostly songs in English, so she's been listening to that. And of course that led us both to make a reference to the cartoon movie "An American Tale" and the song "Somewhere out there," only instead of a star, we have a radio station. Nice. After talking to her and getting Jen's email telling me about the email alert it made me realize something that will probably be impossible to explain. Last night when I was talking to Tiffany I explained it to her and she understood perfectly, so I'll take the risk. (And this is so deep it warrants an entirely new paragraph.)



I suppose that part of it is due to the fact that I have no real home here (the dorm feels much like a crappy hotel room I have to share), and no phone, and therefore I feel a little cut off from my "former life" (which is referring to all of my life prior to arriving in Israel). I told Tiffany that some days I feel like all of my previous years have been some dream, like they aren't real at all, and now here I am. She understood completely, which was nice, because it sounds awfully dramatic, especially considering that I haven't even been here for a month yet. Consequently, living this brand new life, I feel like in some ways I've started back at square one. I've been VERY shy, meek, quiet...only in group settings, mind you - but I haven't really been acting like me. So talking to my sisters helped me to see (by the grace of God only, of course) that the person I am (and am in the process of becoming) IS a real person - personality-wise I don't have to start over here, even though I sometimes feel like I have. So the point is, when I went to the meeting on Thursday I was very confident, friendly, and not nearly as nervous as I was the day before.



Okay...as for the meeting, it was incredible. The two teachers I'm going to be working with are absolutely amazing. They are both extremely warm, friendly, and inviting. One of them insisted that I come find her during the breaks so that she could introduce me to all the other teachers. There will be two other interns at the same school as me, they are both in the second year of the program. Both of them are incredibly kind, considerate, thoughtful - it's just unreal how wonderful the entire situation is as far as the people I'll be working with on a regular basis. At the meeting was the three of us interns, Zvi and Marion (program directos), and one of the English teachers. Alyssa, Veronica, and I (we make up the three interns) got up to use the restroom and as we were walking out there, a bunch of kids came running up to Veronica yelling her name and hugging her. (She was at the same school last year.) It was touching. And Hanin, one of the teachers I'll be working with, told me that the kids had already been asking about when I would be coming in. So a little pressure there, but it's a great thing because they're obviously looking forward to the whole (hopefully) fun experience. So Monday is my first day, I'll just be observing for about a month and a half, and then I'll be working with a small group of students. I'm very very excited - because the school is appreciative of what TASP does there and that isn't necessarily the case in all the schools. How providential!



I STILL do not have a bank account. Since I last posted about it, I've tried three more times. And the infernal bank doors...they ARE NOT smarter than me (though I suppose that's still arguable). It turns out that the bank is just closed all the time, and the doors are impossible to open because they're locked....ALL THE TIME. It really is THE most ridiculous thing I've ever seen. I went to a bank this morning, and got so frustrated that I just cried. I don't even know how to explain it. Financially speaking I'm in a very challenging place, because the student loan money that was supposed to be electronically wired was sent in checks, and since it's an international check it will take about three weeks before I actually have any money. Supposedly the bank that is never open will give me a credit line of so many shekels while the check is in the process of being cashed, but the problem is that I can never get there when they're actually open, which just delays the entire process even more. VERY frustrating, I tell you. And I could send them overnight-ish to my Dad and have him deposit them in my bank account back home, but that presents a problem in that I really do NOT trust the Israeli postal system. And the amount of the checks is a rather substantial amount. So...I'm going to try AGAIN at the bank on campus on Sunday morning, when they are (supposedly) open FOR SURE. We'll see.



Also, and this may not be looked upon in a good way considering what just happened, but I bought a month bus pass, which gets rid of SO much stress on me. I can, with this pass, ride the bus as much as I want over the next month. And considering just to get to the school in Yafo, I'll be riding four buses, it's well worth it, and I don't have to worry about running out of money and being stuck somewhere. I also bought some clothes today, because all the "professional" clothes I have are either sleeveless (and that's unacceptable for the school due to cultural/religious considerations) or are made out of synthetic fabrics and it is just TOO hot and I'm outside TOO much to be wearing synthetic fabrics. Today I bought two pairs of pants and five shirts for 125 shekels. That's about $28 US dollars. Nice.



Ah yes, how could I forget about Ulpan? (Ulpan is Hebrew class) Last night was the first night of Ulpan. It was extremely tedious, which is not so great, considering it was the first day. Let me tell you what I learned:

Ani Teresa (I am Teresa). Ani talmida be Ulpan (I am a student in Ulpan). Ani gara be Tel Aviv (I live in Tel Aviv). I also learned a few other things, but the teacher (mora) went through the first five or so letters of the cursive alphabet which I did not know AT ALL, then she wanted us to start pronouncing words from this worksheet she gave us. It was going a little too fast for my taste, but I'm praying I'll be able to keep up in the class. Ah yes, I also bought my book for Ulpan today. It's been quite a productive day, yet also intensely frustrating. Right now I have to run to a pharmacy or grocery store quickly before they close for Shabbat, otherwise I'm going to be stuck eating out for the next day or so. Love you all!

I'm so completely frustrated because I've posted two or three times since "The Shuk" post, and they randomly will or won't show up, and I'm already so frustrated because the day today has been insane in a not-so-fun way, so I'm past the point of having the patience to figure out what is going on. My apologies...though this post probably won't show up either. Anyway, I am writing - it's just that the internet seems to hate me temporarily.

The Bane of My Existence

I have something to admit that was too embarrassing to share earlier. It's still embarrassing, but a good story, so I'm going to just to suffer through and share the story. I have been trying to establish a bank account here for a few days now. The banks and post offices here have THE most bizarre hours you can possibly imagine. I've decided on the bank, because they are understanding of our situation as students with temporary addresses, and so on. The first time I went to the bank I think it was closed. Regardless, the second set of doors, between the lobby where the personal banking machines are (more complicated than an ATM but along those lines), I couldn't get them to open. There are three large door-sized panes of glass, one of which has two handles. I pushed and pulled on both handles, all to no avail. So here's the thing: I felt like a moron. I mean, I'm 23, with a college degree...it's just a door. It's an inanimate object - surely I can't be beaten by it, right? That's what I thought. I just explained it away that the bank was closed (regardless of the fact that there were still customers sitting inside staring at me trying to get in). Yesteday I went back when I KNEW for certain, without a doubt, NO DOUBT WHATSOEVER, that the bank was open. Again, could not get in the doors. Motioned to the teller inside that I needed help. His idea of helping was making some small indistinguishable motion with his hands. I attempted to do what I thought he meant by said small indistinguishable motion, again to no avail. So this is twice...TWICE, I say, that I have been thwarted by these doors. I am about to venture a third time, because I really truly NEED to open a bank account. This time I'm taking Tiffany with me and told her I'm not touching the doors. She's opening them...and that's all. I'm praying that maybe the bank was closed yesterday and the guy was telling me to go away, not telling me how to open the doors. But regardless I feel like a complete stereotypical American idiot. If we can't get in the bank, there's a chance you might not hear from me for awhile, because I'll be crying in a crumpled heap in front of the doors that are obviously far smarter than I could ever hope to be. Wish me luck!

Bombings make me very sad

I got two newspapers this morning, the Jerusalem Post and the International Herald Tribune (which has the Ha'aretz in it) and read about the bus bombings in Beer Sheva. It was disturbing, obviously. I spoke briefly to two people who are both overseas students here from the states - I basically asked if it disturbed them or freaked them out at all. They both said no, and that made me sad. I'm perfectly okay with the fact that I'm very disturbed by what happened. It's sad because not being disturbed isn't a normal response - it can't be. I suppose the most logical explanation is that they thought I was asking if it scared them to the point that their routines would change and/or they would leave. I've taken the bus four times today already, and it's only 1:00 PM. I get the most freaked out about taking the bus when I've already gotten off of it, only because when I'm on the bus I'm too busy trying to make sure that I don't miss my stop (even though I usually do that anyway). I honestly wish I could avoid taking the bus, but the options to do so would be to take a taxi everywhere, which is outrageously expensive, or to get a moped (which is dangerous in a whole other way) or a car (which is also outrageously expensive). So it seems like I'll be riding the bus. And I'm okay with that - I really am.



Today was the first day of school and was quite an experience. I left at 7:00 and got there about quarter till 8:00. The taxi driver (I had to take a taxi for part of the way because I missed the stop I was supposed to get off to transfer to another bus) dropped me at the wrong spot, so I spent about twenty minutes (maybe even thirty) walking around looking for the school. I was around enough to get the general feel of the first day, which was the whole idea, I think. But I couldn't linger for a long time because the school is gated and there is a guard out front who was eyeing me. Looking suspicious is a bad thing, especially after what happened yesterday, and especially considering that I'll be spending three days a week for probably the next two years at this school. Tomorrow is the big meeting, and I'm nervous out of my skull. God has been and continues to be faithful, undoubtedly, but I still have the queasiness in the pit of my stomach about the whole thing. I'm going to go - I need to look online for a few different things before I attempt to open a bank account today (third attempt...we'll see if I can actually get through the doors this time - I'll be sure to let you know). Love you all!